Beach Waves (Johnnie Guilbert FanFic)

Chapter 14

It's been a week without seeing Johnnie, and believe me, I'm feeling it. We talk everyday but I just feel so alone and empty. I feel so drawn to him. Like a magnet. But I'm so broken. I cannot take the fact that Johnnie kissed another girl just a few days after I leave. It shattered my heart, looking at the picture. The skank shoving her face into his. He's called multiple times with me not answering. His texts spam my phone like a rocket, but I ignore them.

The photo of the girl and Johnnie is being reposted insanely. It's a famous photo how. Which hurts only more.

I stare at the razor blade in front of me, it's silver shine illuminating the bathroom as sunlight hits it. I shouldn't be doing this. I haven't for months. Almost a year. I promised I wouldn't.

I run the blade quickly across my skin, blood oozing out of the wound inflicted by me. I didn't even feel the pain. Only the sweet release I hadn't felt in a long time. I do more cuts, some deeper than others on the upper insides of my arms, along my hips, and inside my thighs.

The god awful noise of my phone ringing makes me cry. I didn't want to talk to Johnnie. I couldn't. But I need to. I answer.

"Hello." I answer softly.

"Jesus Ariel! I've been calling you all fucking day! Look that-

"Johnnie. Please just stop lying to me. Okay? I'm done. I was so stupid to get so quickly into this and so stupid to think this could ever work. Alright? Now just leave me alone!" I cry and hang up. More silent tears run down my cheeks. My phone rings several times but I refuse to answer it now.

I dab up the blood on the enormous amounts of cuts on my body. I switch out of my pajamas and put on black skinny jeans, a grey tank top, and black leather jacket.

I grab my bag and guitar before finding an abandoned warehouse by the edge of the water and start playing. I write a song about Johnnie. It hurts to write but feels good to get out.

I take a deep breath

Wallowing in a disappointed dream yet again

You seemed to make me smile

But you pulled at all the strings

You made me such a mess

And I'm so done with it

It's one damn cold night

Trying to figure out this lie

You played with my mind

In a dark endless fight

Steadfast to the empty dark

You're not the only one

But it seems like you're the worst

And with everything going on

I'm not exuberant like I used to be now

It's one damn cold night

Trying to figure out this lie

You played with my mind

In a dark endless fight

Black

Smeared

Eyes

It's one damn cold night

Trying to figure out this lie

You played with my mind

In a dark endless fight

When I finish singing it, I wipe my tears and start packing up. Until I see a familiar face.

Hi, so I won't usually do these unless I feel they're necessary. YES I DO OWN THESE LYRICS. I DID WRITE THIS SONG! Anyway, this Chapter is dedicated to Rainbow_Sherbert_22 since she begged me to update and I've been TERRIBLE at updating. :)

-Asylum Of Disturbed