Kept from God

XXV ||

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   He hath put forth his hands against such as be at peace with him: he hath broken his covenant.- Psalms 55 :20-21   

Modesty 3am

-Knock knock knock-

I removed myself from Chris's hold leaving the couch, I rushed t'o the door knowing that it was Navea.

"Hey--" 

"Shut up!" I exclaimed silently . pointed over to Chris asleep on the couch. "My room" I lead her to my room quickly and shut the door behind us. I turned on the light "Bitch why is you acting so sketchy .. have you been crying?" She looks at my face. I nod feeling myself about to cry again. I slid down the door bringing my palms to my hands. 

"What's wrong?" I heard her voice get closer I felt her hand on my should. 

"Chris.." I murmur

"What about Chris-- What the fuck is that?!" I was now starring at her, her eyes were glued to my neck . I got up and ran to the mirror noticing a clear as day , reddish purple ring around my neck .

"Where did that come from?" She questioned me immediately . before I could explain what happened she went to the door "this nigga got me all the way fucked up" She said. I stopped her from leaving. "Don't" I stopped her. "What the hell is going on Modesty? .. is Chris putting his hands on you you ? You can talk to me about anything you know that--" 

"He didn't mean to do it .. We was fighting and.. he got mad. he nevergot that mad before " I explain. I shook my head feeling myself begin to cry again "he started crying and apologizing over and over.. He didn't mean to do it but I'm so fuckin' scared Vea"

"Modei..." She hugs onto me. Even though she probably thought I was dumb as hell for still being here with the nigga who choked the hell out of me, She had to accept my dumbness because we're friends, she didn't have a choice now that I was in tears. 

"Get your stuff" She said. "Navea I'm not finna leave him--" "I know he didn't mean to do it but this is crazy --" "I can't leave him.. He needs me "

This was something Navea never expected from me. Being down for a nigga like that was something neither I or she was used to for myself and she didn't know what to do. So instead she sighs "I'm staying here with ya'll tonight .. I'm not leaving you alone" She says. I nod "Thank you" I say.  She says nothing back but she knew I'd put up a fight if I knew something needed to be done, that thing today just so happened that I needed to stay with Chris, no matter what happened. 

---

The morning had came , wasn't no surprise I was late to school as usual. Navea had left I guessed when I was sleeping , I knew she wasn't finna miss school for anything. I went to the bathroom get myself together If I was planning on going. I got undressed, looked in the mirror examining my neck , the mark got more and more visible every time I looked at it.

I tear my eyes from the mirror and proceeded to get in the shower. I let the water run down by back , the hot water tingled in a good way. As I was enjoying the feeling of the water, I soon felt hands wrap around me. Chris's head was tucked in the nape of my neck. 

"Chris.." I try to resist. 

"You know I never meant to hurt you" He mumbles. "I promise you I never wanted to hurt you--"

"I know.. I shoulda never provoked you like that.. just swear to me . when you get mad like that not to take it out on me .. Swear you wont hurt me no more " I saved the crying this time letting him kiss my neck "I swear". He grab my hands. He held them tight, a touch that felt better than any touch. Why did I like him?

August 2:10pm

The bell rung, school was out and Vea wasn't fucking with me right now. She walked passed my ass the entire day, ain't say shit to me but "Move". Because it hadn't hit me that maybe I was being an ass hole I decided to just leave her alone and skip most of my classes with Donte just to smoke. It didn't feel right without Nicky though.

"Nicky mom holdin' the funeral Saturday, She want us to wear red , me you and Modei with the rest of the family" He said taking a puff as we were sitting on the hood of my car sharing a blunt. I shook my head "I ain't ready for this shit man.." 

He chuckles "Say the heartless one in this entire situation" . I smacked my lips and shoot my head "man don't you start too --" 

"Its true.. You fucked up for what you said to Modei and Chris .. and I know you don't wanna talk about it because you guilty.. I know you grieving , we all are .. but you can't be fucking shit up wit the last people we got .. Nicky wouldn't want this shit for us " 

I took another puff "I tried to call them yesterday after Vea left the crib.. ner one of em returned my shit.. " 

"I talked to Modei today, they coolin.. She said Chris ain't been too grand though, you should go see bout your family." I rolled my eyes. Donte was all about that family shit, his parents gave a fuck that he was close with all his family, they'd wish he'd do better for his little cousins and siblings. 

"Man Ion know --"

"You gon have to, you know a nigga on punishment for like , the rest of the fucking year, so I gotta go home. I was lucky enough to share a piece a joint witchu" He shrugged hopping of the hood of my car. "You better be going too--" 

"Man shut cho ass up, I'm going!" He laughed walking to his car. 

I got in the car and just as I was about to start it up and leave out I get a text message. 

I need you right now- My girl🙄💓

ENOUGH WITH LE SHORT ASS CHAPTERS!! (i know) I'm sorry! I be trying to make them longer but I don't wanna give too much away