Bring me to life with Steve
You stood on the edge of the ten story building looking down at the street below, night had fallen long ago. You had no idea how you got to this point, but you had. Every day, the pain, the anger, what had been taken from you, the things you were forced to do. You continued watched the street below you, wondering what it would be like. Just to feel nothing, the freeing notion of it all ending.
The wind kicked up against your face, brushing the hot wind up to you. The smell of car exhaust wafting lightly, you closed your eyes, feeling the slight pull. You were teetering in the edge, whether to let go or hold on.
"Y/n." His soft gentle voice came from behind you.
You breathed in deeply, the only person who seemed to see your pain, anger, sadness. You had thought he had left for the mission with the rest of them, making this easier on you. A slow tear rolled down your cheek, the walls had been crumbling your resolve to be the hard person everyone had come to know was faltering. The infrastructure slowly melting away because of him, leaving you open, the thought scared you more then you wanted to admit.
"Y/n." He called out a bit louder.
Even if you didn't want to open up but you knew you were, giving him piece by piece of the person you had been and still tried so hard to be, only to fail. You wanted to be the person they thought you were but every time you messed up. A ragged shaky breath tore it's way through your body. You choke back the sob that wanted to escape.
"If you need to fall, fall into me."
His words were calculated, he knew what he needed to say. Slowly you opened your eyes, looking over your shoulder at him. He was ten feet from you his pale blue eyes trained on you, his face tight with concern. The wind gently ruffled his sandy hair, he was dressed ready for the mission, shield at his feet. Steve had some how known, and dropped everything to come to you.
"Steve." Your voice croaked, as another hot tear rolled down your face.
"Look, I'm here. I see you, I see your pain." He said softly, you could see the tenseness in his body, his hesitation. "You don't have to hold it all in, if you need to fall, I will catch you. Just fall this way."
"I destroy everything I touch." You looked back out over the edge, watching as a car passed oblivious to the perils going on high above it.
"You don't." His voice was soft, so soft. "You bring life to everyone you meet. Trust me, I know. I've seen it, heard it, felt it."
"Steve." You closed your eyes, lost memories ones buried deep slowly breaking through the cracks of the box you had buried it in so along ago. "You don't know the things I've done."
"Does it matter what you did? Or who you are now?" He asked, you heard the resolve in his voice as he took a step towards you.
"I've hurt people, people that trusted me, loved me. All because I forced to choose." Tears slipped down you face. "I don't deserve kindness, or sympathy."
"So have I." Your eyes snapped opened at his admission, you turned your body to face him.
You had arms crossed over your chest, hugging yourself tight, trying to stop the tears that never seem to end. The wind blew lightly at your back, hair pushed forward, you brushed it back, keeping your eyes on him.
"Why?" You asked, you had to know exactly why he came.
"Why what?" He asked, taking another small step towards you.
"Why are you here?" The question came out more pleading. "Why didn't you go?"
"I'm on this roof top cause you need someone, because I care about you." His eyes watched as you looked over your shoulder at the city below. "Because I care what happens to you, whether or not you see it, you are important. To everyone and especially to me."
"Steve." You cried out, fresh batch of tears rolled down your face as you hugged yourself tighter. All you wanted to do was scream, scream at him to save you from yourself but you couldn't. You couldn't form those words. "I.. I'm scared, it's like a thousand year nightmare, and I just can't wake up. Like I'm dead inside."
"Just fall into me, I promise you, I will always be here to catch you. No matter what happened or will happen, I am here for you."
He was standing just in front you, his face tilted up to yours. Eyes pleading you just come down, you saw the pain in him, one mirroring your own. He could see you hesitating, he reached his hand up to you.
You reached your hand down, taking it lightly. He helped you off the edge, wrapping you in his missive arms. You let yourself fall into his chest as sobs began to rake through body. Your knees buckled, and he fell to the roof top with you. Steve pulled you into him as the tears fell and your chest heaved with each breath you took. His hand rubbing gentle circles on your back, Steve let his head rest on yours. You clung onto him like your life depended on it, and at the moment it did, everything you bottled up for so long poured out of you.
"I'll never let go, okay?" He kissed the top of your head. "I'll be here to help you get through those nightmares, I'll be here to wake you up. Whatever you need, whenever you needed it."
You took a deep breath, calming yourself, inhaling him. Slowly you raised your head back up, your eyes meeting those blues again. He lifted one of his hands swiping a thumb across your cheek, brushing the tears from your face. He gave you a gently reassuring smile.
"All of us have this point in our lives, okay?" He smiled softly, tucking some hair behind your ear. "Where you feel frozen inside, everything feels dark and like there's nothingness inside. You just have to take it one day at a time, find one thing to hold on to, just one thing to get you through till tomorrow."
"And then what?" You asked softly.
"You keep fighting."
