17.) did you love her? - all the time.
18.) does it hurt, having your heart broken.
20.) Why me? - because you saw me when I was invisible.
37.) I'm fine. - you don't look fine. - then stop looking.
47.) I'm in love with you, that's why!
Crystlblu
Chris angst to fluff
You sat in a dimly lit bar with your closest friends, Sasha was gushing as Alex had finally popped the question. She was showing her ring off to everyone, the light in hers was heart warming to see. However it made that dull ache in your chest become even more pronounced. It wasn't that along ago you felt that way, excited for the next chapter of your own life to start.
You excused yourself to go to the bar and grab another a drink, just needing a moment away from all happy and in lovness. You took a heavy breath, willing back tears that threaten to spill.
"Does it hurt, having your heart broken" Amalia asked as she walked up beside you. She had never been in relationship, she was fast tracking her life to be the first female ceo of the company she worked at and never had time.
"Remember when we were kids and you broke your arm, how you screamed cause of it and wouldn't stop. It's kinda like that, except more and it hurts all over." You replied, looking over to the table where the rest of your friends. "It never goes way, it bleeds from one day to the next."
"I'm sorry, we could go some where else." She offered, you smiled sadly shaking your head.
"It's okay. I'll be fine, it's just sometimes I hear or see something that reminds me of him." You sighed.
~~
Meanwhile
Chris sat with a group of his friends in a dimly lit bar, music blared over speakers. He was nursing on the beer that was in his hands while his friends were content making moves on other women in the bar. All except Alex, who was just happy sitting at the table with his friend.
"Did you love her?" Alex asked, not bothering to beat around the bush any longer. He knew the reason for Chris's unnatural solemn mood as of late.
"All the time." He sighed not bothering to look up from label of the beer he had been picking at.
"Then call her, you idgit." Alex retorted.
"And say what? I was the one that broke it off." Chris snapped, leaning forward on his elbows.
"Say, hey I'm Chris Evans the worlds biggest moron." Alex rolled his eyes, wanting to smack Chris upside the head. "That would be a good start."
"Dude, I can't just call her up and say that. Was I an idiot, yes. But we had problems long before that fight." Chris stood abruptly, walking away from the table.
He didn't want to reminded that the reason his last relationship went south was partially his fault. He had been gone to so much it wasn't entire your fault that you had made close friends with Phil. It just made his blood boil when he had come home from filming early to see the two of you hanging out. His mind went straight to darkest thoughts he could muster. You had pleaded with him that you weren't cheating on him, that Phil was just a good friend.
It didn't matter, by that point words were said, damaged had been dealt. He had regretted that fight ever since but you had told him if he walked out, don't bother coming back, so he hadn't.
He made it to the bar counter when he bumped into you, neither of you realizing that both of your hearts started beating in double time.
"Hey, y/n." He said, wondering if you could hear the shakiness of his words. "How are you?"
"I'm fine." You lied, taking a deep breath trying to still your trembling hands as a new wave of heartbreak coursed through you.
"You don't look fine." He said, noticing the absence of your smile.
"Then stop looking." You retorted, turning to leave, but he was quicker then you. Chris grabbed you by the inside of your elbow, you bit down on your lip. Telling yourself to be strong, don't make a scene, you weren't one of those girls.
"Y/n, I'm sorry." He said softly, barely audible above the sound of the thumping base.
"So am I." You replied softly pulling your arm free and leaving the building. Had you known Chris was going to be there you wouldn't of come. Everything was still to fresh, still to painful.
The cold air of the night hit you, stinging your face where alone tear had slipped out. You pulled your light weight hoodie tighter as a chill set into your bones. Fall had already set and soon winter would be upon you. Your first winter with out him, the realization hitting you hard as another tear rolled down your cheek.
"Y/n!" Chris yelled as you walked down the street.
"Go away Chris!" You yelled back, you knew it was no use, that once he had it in his mind he next to impossible to stop.
"No, not until you stop to talk to me." He half yelled as he jogged up to you.
"Why?!" You stopped spinning in your spot, fresh tears rolling down you face.
"Because this is too important not to." He replied, his hand hesitated, wanting nothing more then to comfort you even though he was the reason you were hurting.
"Fine. Let me start then, why out of all the women in the world did you choose me? why me?" You yelled.
"Because you saw me when I was invisible." He replied softly, taking a breath. "I've known you for decades and you were always there for me, after every rejection, you were here for me."
"Chris, why, why did this have to happen?" You cried hugging yourself tighter, trying to ward of the chill and the feelings threatening you.
"I.. I don't know." He looked down, feeling the sting in his own eyes. "Can we ever go back to just being the friends we were?"
"No." You replied, turning to leaving, he grabbed your arm one more time.
"Why not?"
"I'm in love with you, that's why!" You turned, screaming at him.
"I love you still, please, don't walk away." He begged you, his eyes pleading with you. You could see his heart break, mirroring your own and it killed you.
"Why? You were the one that walked out that door. Tell me one reason why I shouldn't walk now."
"Because, a minute hasn't gone by that I don't regret walking out that door, a second hasn't passed that haven't wanted to see your smile. I hate ever opening the door and walking out, that I let my jealousy get the better of me." He explained, taking a step into you. "And if you'll let me, I'd like to open that door and come back in."
"Chris." You cried, flinging your arms around his neck. He shifted reaching into his jacket pocket. He pulled your ring out, smirking as he put it back on your finger.
"I've held on to it since you threw it at my head, hoping, maybe some day you'd let me put it back on." He smiled, making you chuckle. "I love you."
"I love you too, idiot."
