Fleetwood Mac-Part III of Fritz Series

A Conversation With Me, About Myself--and Tom Petty.

"So you're saying there is no truth, the story Scarlett Mitchell wrote about an affair with Stevie Nicks?"

"I'm saying, I love Stevie she's a beautiful woman with a beautiful soul. But she's got kids for Christ sakes, and any idiot can tell she and Lindsey are in love. Why would a woman like her step out on her man when he practically worships her?"

"Well, if she were in love or-lust maybe"

"Yeah, but Stevie ain't like that. the kid's got heart, and when she gives her heart over to something she means it one-hundred percent."

"Would you say your love for her transcends sexual feelings?"

"I'd say not many men could love a chick like her"

"But you could make love to her?"

"Like I said, I think we're soulmates...but only musically. Lindsey's her guy, and that guys a off his rocker insane"

"Ladies and gentlemen you heard it first here on channel four, American Rock superstar Tom Petty of Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, and his relationship or lack thereof with Stevie Nicks. Coming up next a bit of news closer to home, David Bowie and his new album out next month we'll have him here in the studio next stay tuned"

Stevie's smoking a joint. She rolled it, she lit it, and she's not sharing. She's stressed out. What's worse is she stole my stash to do it with. I keep my very abbreviated amount of grass well away from the kids, the dog, and my big brother. Robin can sniff it out sometimes if she puts her mind to it, but on the whole it's safe from consumption. Not tonight, after announcing his interview with the BBC just one week ago, To decided to take to the airwaves with a tell all about his alleged affair with my wife. For weeks he avoided phone calls, letters, in person visits, even a letter from our attorney threatening to sue him for slander.

Like the true hippie he is Tom ignored it all, marching into studio number seven in London with a top hat and a leather coat. No shoes, and ripped jeans a cigarette in one hand and a beer in the other. live and in living color in front of millions of people around the world, he lied. He told the world he loved my wife, that she was his soulmate, and that they were lovers. But they'd never had sex. Their close relationship during the recording of Bella Donna was only a musical one, nothing physical. Nothing intimate.

I've been on the verge of suing Petty for the last six days, now I think I'll send him a bottle of wine. Why he would lie about that I don't know, he has nothing to gain from it. When it comes to affairs it only helps his rock credentials to be linked romantically to Stevie, she's hot and extremely popular. But he didn't go for it, in a show of class I never would have expected he decides to shut down the speculation with one interview.

Why?

"I need to talk to him" my beer glass is half empty otherwise I'd probably drop it "Why? What do you need to say to? It's over Stephanie, he put it to bed" bad metaphor. I can't help it, the thought of them alone in a room together makes me shake anxiously. That should be the end of it...he did us a favor that's all.

"Wake up and smell the coffee dumbass"

I nearly scream, it's me!

Or not me...alt-me. Old me. The grumpy asshole who I grow up to be in some other universe. This time he's not in a hospital gown with half his ass hanging out. Instead he's wearing skin tight jeans and black leather boots...and he's got a tiny protruding pooch. It wasn't there the last time I saw him "Men gain weight when we get married, it's a statistic dummy. Or haven't you noticed you don't fit your old bell bottoms anymore?"