Fleetwood Mac-Part III of Fritz Series

White Winged Dove

"Just breath baby, you'll be okay." Stevie's standing next to me in tears in the blazing white light of the OR. As soon as I was transported from the hotel to the E.R. a neuro surgeon examined my CAT scans and listened to my medical history, along with a phone call to my specialist in California. His diagnosis? I need to have a tumor surgically removed from the left side of my brain...something I already knew and have been in denial about for months. Stevie's in panic mode at the moment, and I feel guilty for putting her through this. New Lindsey is supposed to be upfront about things like this, but I genuinely put this out of my mind after we reconciled so grateful was I that we were back together.

"We'll have to completely shave you're head sir-" pardon? Shave my head? Cut my hair sure but shaved down to a cue ball? Fuck that..."Do what you have to do Dr. Saki" Stevie's fearful gaze slices through any objections I'm about to lodge. Well, there goes four years of hair growth down the tubes. A nurse sits me up and with a pair of clippers and some scissors they start shearing me like a two legged sheep. Can they at least do my beard too? I'm going to look all kinds of lopsided when this is done.

Directing my attention back to my wife I give her a soft smile taking her hand in mine "Steph, sweetheart I'm gonna be alright this is the best hospital in the city. Probably the country" sniffling she wipes away at tears "You're such an idiot Linds, why didn't you get the surgery when you were supposed to?" I know she doesn't mean to be so harsh but in her state of mind her filter dissolves away as she reprimands me "I know sweetheart I'm sorry" hair falls down around my waist like I'm at the barbers, and after about twenty minutes they break out the straight razor to remove the remainder of my hair.

"He'll be alright Ms. Nicks, Dr. Saki is the best Neurosurgeon in Japan, he' operated on General MacArthur" I don't know whether to be comforted by that or disturbed. The last time MacArthur was in Japan was the fifties? Early sixties maybe. But I guess the US. Army wouldn't let just any old surgeon work on a war hero like him, so...hooray?

Stevie just nods wiping more tears, trying to calm her down I take ahold of her hand kissing her knuckles "How do I look?" the nurse rinses and wipes the last of the shaving cream from my newly bald head "Like one of those punk rockers we saw in London" ah yes, our journey to London's punk underground. We stuck out pretty badly, but I've been so curious about the movement I couldn't resist going to check it out. It was eye opening, and I found myself inexplicably drawn to the energy and the sound. It's more pure than the music I've been exposed to in the studio recently. And it reminds me of the acid rock that got me started years ago.

I'm a fan. Stevie's more ambivalent about it.

"So you're saying this should be my new look from now on?" teasing her I tug my wife to my side kissing her knuckles again "God no, I mean you're gorgeous with short hair Linds but you know I love you wild and hairy" she chuckles through her tears and bends down sitting next to me in bed "But as long as you come back to me I don't care how you look" taking her face in my hands I kiss her lips gently over and over "I'm not going anywhere Steph, I promise. Can't have you looking for hairy long haired rockers in other places. I'm sure Mick wouldn't mind being first in line-" she pulls a face kissing my neck and we both laugh.

"Not in this lifetime, maybe in an alternate universe"

The doctor and nurses return having swept my hair away "We're ready to take you back Mr. Buckingham" Stevie clings to me tightly, her arms and her mind stubbornly refusing to let me go gently I rub her hips then pull at her with one final kiss "I love you" she whispers still holding me tightly "I love you more" I say in return, and she steps away. For a second she flashes in front of my vison turning back to the denim clad hippie girl I met ten years ago. Her hair long and twisted with flowers and ribbons, her eyes swimming with warmth and optimism.