Daydreaming (Nash Grier)

twenty two

ariana's pov

i tried, but i couldn't say a word.

we just sat in silence.

i was in shock, i didn't even cry yet.

she had two arms, two legs, two eyes.

she had one boob.

"breast cancer." she said simply and i felt like i was about to pass out.

it took a while but i finally managed to spit out some words.

"y-you're too young to get breast cancer.." is all i could say which didn't help much.

she just cried harder.

"i can tell you what happened." she said and i nodded my head.

"so a few months ago, i was showering and when i got out of the shower, my right boob was all red and it was completely swelled up. i didnt really think much of it, but another day i got a horrible pain in my boob and my mom took my to the doctor's. they sent me to the emergency room immediately and said that i had recently had many symptoms of breast cancer, but i was much too young. turns out it's possible for a fourteen year old can get breast cancer, because i had my first mammogram and it showed a little white dot in my breast that was apparently spreading way too quickly. they rushed me into a room and i dont remember much after that, all i remember is waking up with one boob."

i had finally started bawling.

i hugged autumn as tightly as i could.

"autumn, i'm so sorry.. why didn't you tell us?" i asked, trying not to sound offended which i was actually slightly offended.

she sighed and continued.

"i didn't and dont want to be known as "the girl with cancer.." you know? i want to be remembered not by the girl who lost a cancer battle but the girl who fought for what she believed in, who was brave and strong, and a kind young lady. i don't want a pity party just because this cancer is taking over my life. maybe i can survive this battle, maybe i'll come out strong and i wont have to fear not being remembered by the person i truly am."

tears were flowing out of my eyes like a river.

i hugged autumn and she wiped the single tear that had escaped from the brims of her eyes.

"i can't let this disease take over." she stated firmly and i just looked into her green eyes and smiled.

i was so proud of her.

"so does this mean you're going swimming?"

-

"after telling all of you this, i hope you wont be there for me just to feel sorry, but to recognize that i'm not going to give up on this battle." she finished explaining to everyone's shocked faces.

hayes collapsed into nash's arms and anna collapsed in mine.

cameron stood speechless.

"i- is there anything we can d-do?" nash mumbled.

"yes, actually. i need you to all to shut up and be happy for me. i dont want to waste my time being upset. i need to be happy as long as i can." she stated and we all agreed.

we all did the best we could to tune out the fact that what our closest friend could die at any moment.

but we did it for her, which motivated us.

-

as i hugged autumn one last time before we all left, i made sure to remind her to keep me updated every day.