The Open Door - Sean and Kaycee

21. Two Weeks

Sean

"Sean and Kaycee! Let's see you do your thing," Tricia yells.

I look over at Kaycee, who's completely lost in thought. She has that spacey expression which glazes over her face whenever she's daydreaming. But her brow is furrowed like she's worried about something--an unusual expression for her, because she's usually so carefree and happy.

I nudge her gently. "C'mon, Ricebowl, we're up next."

She shakes her head like a wet dog to get out of her daze. Adorable. "Huh? Sorry, what did I miss?"

I laugh. "You're such a weirdo. We're performing the choreo right now."

"Oh crap," she says, quickly fixing her ponytail. "Okay, I'm ready."

The dance goes pretty well. But I've noticed that Kaycee is a bit off today. Her dancing isn't up to its usual standard of energy and passion. She stops dancing as soon as the choreography is done, not freestyling at all. I wonder if she's not feeling well. Usually nothing would prevent her from giving a dance less than 110%. (A/N lol, pretend like Kaycee didn't slay this routine)

When class is over, Kaycee and I linger in the room like we usually do. I glance at her. There are dark bags under her eyes. She's pale, even after the exertion of class. Her eyes lack their usual brightness. What's going on?

"Hey, Kaycee?" I begin tentatively.

"Huh? What's up?" she says, her voice hoarse and weak.

"Are you okay? You haven't been yourself since yesterday when we had lunch. Are you sick?" I ask her.

"No, no, I'm not sick, I'm just--" she stops, covering her face with her hand. "I can tell you anything, right Shamu?"

"Yes, you can tell me anything," I say, a little too eagerly. "I'm listening."

"I--I'm a little confused right now," she says, closing her eyes.

"About what?" I prod her gently.

"About... everything really. But mostly about--my family."

I look at her in surprise. Out of all of the things she could have said, I was definitely not expecting that. Kaycee and I talk to each other about everything. But it's almost an unspoken rule that we never discuss her family. Or the fact that she's lost.

"Your family," I repeat faintly. "What about them?"

"Just... I don't really know. Sometimes I wonder if I was wrong. And I'm scared." Her voice falters. "Scared that it will all come back and catch me."

She must be delirious. We've never talked about any of this before. "Kayc, I don't know what you're talking about."

She blinks at me. "I feel trapped. And I don't know how to get out." A single tear creeps out of her eye. "Help me," she whispers. "please."

I feel my insides melting. I sit down beside her and put my arms around her. "I'm not going anywhere," I reassure her. "I'll always be here for you." I hesitate before adding, "And you're not trapped. My dad used to tell me that we are all as boundless as the universe. That we're never trapped because we're always expanding."

Kaycee is looking at me intently. Her eyes have regained their intense brightness. "Boundless, huh?" She's silent for a second. "I never asked you this, but I'm curious. What did your dad do when he was... you know, still here?"