"Twenty five." Matthew answers as I scribble out fifteen on my sheet. The door to my room opens wider and I see my mum come in.
"Dinner is ready." She says with a smile. She walks down the hall and I stand up from where I was sitting on my bed. Matthew sits up too and we both walk to the kitchen.
My dad and Gavin are both sitting at the table. My mum is standing at the stove, fixing plates and I sit down with Matthew. My mum places all of the plates around the table and sits down. The seating places are me next to Matthew who is next to my mum who across from her sits Gavin and next to Gavin is my dad and then I sit across from him, repeating the cycle.
My mum cooked pasta and made a salad. My dad starts to eat along with my mum. I pick up my fork and begun the meal. Gavin is able to eat on his own. He has learned how to over the years. Matthew starts to eat also and there is a brief silence that fills the room before my mum begins a conversation.
"So, Matthew, how are you?" She asks as she grips her glass of lemonade. Matthew looks up at my mum.
"I'm good, thank you." He answers. I look over to my dad and he raises an eyebrow at me. I mouth "what" and he slightly shrugs.
"Cassidy doesn't really tell us anything about you." My mum laughs.
"Sounds like her." Matthew smiles and turns his head ever so slightly at me.
"Now, she does tell us about the friends she has at school. Are they your friends too?" My mum asks him.
"Uh, yes. They are. I met then in freshman year." He says and takes a drink from the glass set in front of him. I clench my fork and hope that my dad doesn't flip out.
"Freshman year? Are you a sophomore?" My dad asks.
"Yes, sir. I met them all last year and some are juniors and seniors." Matthew says and faces my dad.
"Cassidy sure did leave out that part." My dad laughs.
"It's not a problem that he is older," my mum joins in, "It's normal for the boy to be older." She starts to laugh. I look over at her and sigh. We finish the meal with my mum and Matthew conversing and leaving my dad and I to communicate through body language when either of the two say something wrong.
"Well, it was great having you over Matthew." My mum says as we stand at the front door.
"It was great for you to have me here. Thank you." He smiles. I open the door and walk out with him, closing the door behind me.
"You're going to walk home?" I ask him.
"Yeah. Uh, see, when I drove you those past days, it was kind of illegal since I am not eighteen and I don't want to take another risk." He laughs.
"Oh, okay. I can ask my dad to drive you since he seems to be in love with you." I say sarcastically.
"Oh, yeah, that would be a joyous car ride." He smiles.
The next day I wake up to my phone ringing at four in the morning.
"Hello?" I ask in a raspy voice.
"Cas, you'll never believe this." Matthew says.
"What?" I ask.
"I have ten thousand followers on both Vine and Twitter!" he says excitedly.
"That's awesome. What about the rest of the guys?"
"They have pretty much the same. Cameron about a thousand above me and Carter about one hundred below. And the great part is that people are commenting saying that they want to meet us. Nash just texted me and he says that he is talking to his dad about tying to find a way to meet up with all of the fans."
"That's. That's amazing, Matthew."
"I'm telling you Cas, you have to start a Vine or a YouTube account."
"Yeah, so people can start cyber bullying." I laugh.
Matthew sighs and says, "Okay. Well, sorry if I woke you up."
"It's fine. I guess i'll just try to make myself useful till school starts."
"Fine then."
"Okay, fine." I say and I hang up. I sit up and place my phone on my nightstand. I stand and stretch out my arms. I get on my knees and reach under my bed. I grab my sketch book and brush the dust off of it. I sit down on my bed and retrieve the pencil that is in the book. I open up to a blank page and start to doodle.
(Please download the app Listen On Repeat and listen to the song Smother by Daughter)
Knock. Knock. Knock.
I hide the book under my pillow and say to come in. The door opens and my mum walks in.
"I didn't expect you to be up this early." She smiles. She walks in and closes the door behind her.
Sh sits next to me on my bed.
"Baby, I wanted to talk to you about school. What exactly happens? The doctor called and asked to check up on you." She asks.
"Well, I walk there and get my work done and come back."
"I know for a fact that is not true."
I sigh. I think of all the times that were worst.
The thing is, being verbally bullied is far more worst than being physically bullied.
"Uh, they call me emo. Whore. Worthless and obnoxious. Too skinny. Too fat. And when I thought that being with Matthew and his friends would make me less vulnerable and seem popular, thy just tore me down even more." A single tear runs down my cheek. "They slip me notes that say faggot or stupid. At lunch they act like I am not even there. Skip me in line. Kick my bag. Mum, I want to die!" I sob. She quickly wraps her arms around me and pulls me to her.
I sob into her shoulder. And that was the first time I ever said it.
I want to die.
"And it makes me know why my own mum wouldn't want me. Because I am a worthless piece of shit and no one, would ever want to spend time and money on me." I choke out and tears continue to roll down my cheeks. "Some times, I wonder why you and dad would even bother with me."
"Because you are everything we could have ever asked for Cassidy." My mum says. "I love you so much, baby. Both me and your father and Gavin love you so much. And I know for a fact that Matthew does too."
"Why!" I yell and stand up. "Look at me! I am an ugly and stupid slut! Why would anyone love me? I am broken to point where I cannot be fixed. Why would you waste your money and time on trying to fix me? I would rather you not. I wake up every bloody morning looking at myself in the mirror and thinking 'Why can't I be like them? Why can't I be the beautiful blond and skinny girl who everyone wants to be and date? Why do I have to be such a fuck up?' Answer me!" I cry out.
My mum stands up and reaches for me. I back away to the wall.
"No. You know that after this you can't just act like everything is fine with me. Just send me to a foster home across the country so I can be away from that goddamn hell hole." I say as I point to the direction of my school.
"Cassidy," My mum chokes, "Baby, please come here."
"Why do you love me!" I sob and sink to the floor. I close my eyes as my mum gets in the floor and wraps her arms around me. "Why?" I sob. I open my eyes to see my dad and Gavin both standing at the doorway.
"I want to die" I whisper.
***
Holy freaking crap this chapter hit home.
~izzysam
YOU ARE READING
Saved By You
Fanfiction"Now, you may think that Matthew and I's love was just a normal teenage story, but it was more than that. So much more. He saved me. Maybe, not enough to stop me now but, it could've been a lot worse. My life is hell. But, with Matthew, everything w...
