Without The Thought of Him

six years and seven months ago

Isaac had the fattest crush on Sam.

To some, like Sandra, this was a no brainer. Well, then again she was the only person who knew about this and she's been rooting for them since the day they met.

Isaac never really acknowledged his feelings toward Sam because they were never this strong or something that he thought twice about. He always thought the attraction he had to Sam was just a very effortless and close friendship feeling. But as time went on, those feelings grew bigger and stronger.

And to be honest, he kind of loved it.

It's been so damn long since he had a crush on someone. He kind of liked a girl in his fourth grade class, but she ended up finding out and punching him in the gut because she "thought it was gross that a guy liked her" and "she was an independent woman", which was honestly way before her time and Isaac had to give her props for it.

Yeah, so he didn't really have the best luck with crushes and relationships. But Sam was different. Liking Sam actually made Isaac feel freaking fantastic in a weird way. Probably because he could actually possibly have a chance with him.

All of the subtle flirting and hanging out really did prove Sam's feelings toward him, right? Normal friends, who are guys at least, don't say things remotely close to the things Isaac and Sam say to each other.

Maybe Isaac was narrow minded, hopeful, and oblivious. But he had very strong feelings about the potential relationship the two could have.

But then again, what did Isaac really know about love and relationships? Literally nothing. All of the Larry Stylinson fanfiction he read was mostly sexual and way too intense for him to even comprehend sometimes.

All inexperience behind, Isaac knew he had to do something big and special for Sam's birthday. It was the perfect opportunity to tell his friend how he really felt because he was sick of hiding it all inside. He knew Sam felt the same way, so why waste anymore time as friends? Simply confessing his thoughts and feelings toward the boy didn't seem too bad, especially since Sam was going to be in such a good mood.

Sam's birthday was just around the corner and Isaac convinced his mom to take him to the store to buy a card and a gift. He had extra cash from his own birthday to spend so luckily it doesn't take too much convincing for his mom to drive him to Walmart after work one evening.

He picks out a standard birthday card and then heads into the electronic section where he grabs the new Star Trek DVD. He knew how much those films meant to Sam and he wanted his gift to be meaningful and special. Hopefully the boy didn't already go out and buy it, but in case he did Isaac grabs a bag of sour Skittles and drops it into his cart.

That night Isaac wraps the DVD and candy with the help of his mom, placing it on his dresser so it'd be safe by the time it was actually his birthday. Isaac then sits down on his bed, grabbing a pen and his school binder for something hard to write on. He takes the card out of the bag and inhales deeply, knowing he was probably going to end up writing a lot. A lot was an understatement.

Dear Sam,

Happy birthday!! It's the big thirteen and I'm kind of upset that you're older than me now. I know you're probably going to rub that in my face forever, but it's worth it. If there's one person I let bully and harass me, it's you<3 Haha, just kidding. But really tho. You're my best friend and I can't believe this is the first birthday we're going to be best friends for. I bet we'll be besties for about fifty more. Hopefully you'll like and tolerate me for that long tho. I know you had a hard year and it has sucked seeing you sad. I'm glad things are better now and I'm glad you have a happy outlook on life. You're amazing, Sam. Love you. Is