Arranged marriage

Shattered

Sophomore year.

             I was filled with fear as I sat there waiting to see what he had in his twisted mind. He stared at me with nothing but emptiness in his dark eyes.

           "We could have been so happy, ya know." He smirked and my heartbeat raced as I thought of all the things that could be going through his mind. "I love you so much...but you don't." He slowly walked over in front of me kneeling down.

           "I do love you..."

            "Don't lie, you cunt!" He yelled making me tremble. "I know you don't! Don't you ever lie to me ever again! You can't put those cute eyes to shame now can you?" He grabbed my jaw making me wince in pain.

           "I-I'm sorry." I cried, he let go of my jaw and took another shot.

"You know...your so pathetic and perfect at the same time. You can be a complete bitch yet be the most innocent and cutest thing ever." He walked back over to me and this time sat next to me. He gently ran his finger from my cheek down to my neck and stopped where my shirt collar did.

"Ace...can I go? Please?" Then I screamed when I felt a stream of pain ran through my neck. Right, where he traced a line with his finger he was running a cold blade. Once I saw the pocket knife I tried to get away but he was too fast for me. "Ace, stop!"

"Shut the hell up!" He grabbed my neck and pressed my head against his chest. "The more you struggle the more cuts you get, so stay the fuck still!"

He pressed the knife on my arm and the more I wouldn't let myself go the more he pressed it into my skin until I let myself go and laid on his chest as he told me. "I just wanna love you...hug you...kiss you." He gently whispered in my ear and I felt streams of tears fall from my cheek.

"Okay...I'll hug you...just stop hurting me please?" I slowly wrapped my arms around him and he did the same. "See? Just ask and I'll do it..." I felt the blood rushing down my neck and into my shirt.

"Why couldn't you love me?" He pulled away and cupped my face in his hands staring deep into my eyes. "Why couldn't you be mine? Mine and only mine." He traced my lips with his finger and slammed his lips on mine.

I didn't know what to do I felt gross and violated, this guy had just cut me and now he's saying that all he wants is for me to love him? I felt the cold blade press against my hip hard. I kissed him back still crying and hoping that this would be over soon.

             He let go of the knife and rested his head on my chest gently placing his right hand on my cheek. I shut my eyes praying and hoping that I'd just die. There wasn't any hope anymore, I'm covered in blood and I've been verbally and physically abused by a drunk and sober psychopath.

          "Your face is soft...why is your collar so high." He looked down to my chest and all at once ripped the front of it.

          "Ace, stop! Stop!" I ran to the door and fumbled with the lock but this fucker had four locks on his door that have a key. Right as I turned to the back door Ace grabbed me by the hair and dragged me back to the living rooms.

        "You fucking, bitch!" He pinned me on the floor and slowly dragged the knife just to the point where it would bleed just above my breasts. I screamed and scrambled to get away and all at once there was bagging on the door.

"Ace, stop!" I screamed and felt my vision start to blur and go dark. Just as I heard a window shatter I blacked out.

The pain was all I felt and black was the only thing that I saw. Slowly my vision came back and I sat up groaning.

"Sila!" I heard my mom call and I turned my head and saw that she was right by my side.

"Where am I?"

"You're in the hospital baby...your safe now."

"Where is he?" I snapped and tried to sit up but my dad held me down. "Let me go! Where the fuck did that psychopath go!?"

"He's in prison! Calm down, Sila! Sila calm down!" I eventually gave up and broke down.

"It's over now..." My dad hugged me and I stared at the hall when I heard yelling.

"Where is she?! Where's my best friend?!" Tejah burst through the door and stared at me with watery eyes. "I'm so sorry..." She ran over to me and jumped in my arms crying.

I hugged her as tightly as possible feeling a wave of happiness and hope fill me. "I'm so sorry I didn't notice...I'm so sorry." She cried and I pulled away giving her a shy smile.

"You could say I'm a good actress, huh?" She playfully hit my thigh laughing a little.

              "How can you be so cheerful still?"

            "I'm okay now...plus I have everyone I need with me." I smiled and she hugged me once more before I told them that I needed to use the bathroom. I walked down the hall and made sure to lock the door. With my eyes closed, I slowly walked to the mirror.
 
          My heart was beating so hard it actually hurt me. I opened my eyes and cupped my mouth looking in the mirror in horror. Bruises all on my right arm where he had thrown me on the ground before he pinned me down. A cut that was stitched up from my neck to my collarbone. Where he had cut above my chest was bandaged up and I think that the fact I couldn't see it was a good thing. I thought all my insecurities were enough but now the list was added onto.

       I brought my fingers to my lips and felt tears fall the more I looked at myself. They were swollen along with my eyes. I had huge bags under my eyes and there was some residue from my eye makeup. My hair was a frizzy mess and I felt my lips quiver.

           "Why can't I like myself for one day? Why can't I not compare myself to anyone else? Why can't I ever be happy?" I cried and slammed my hand into the mirror making it shatter everything. I couldn't give any less of a fuck about the blood rushing down my hand...I felt like I was going insane. My sanity had shattered along with that mirror. The door burst open and two male nurses looked at me and my fist in concern as I balled my eyes out. "Why couldn't he just finished me off?"

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