her.

ii

i don't really know when it started
or really when it ended either
but i used to believe he was the reason it ended.

now i know that's unreasonable
because he didn't even know who i was
how could a stranger fix a broken girl without saying a word ?

now i think it was myself.
now i think i was tired of feeling like shit.
now i think i realised i couldn't wait around to be fixed.

feeling sad had become a reflex
happiness was brief and fleeting
only because i knew how fragile happiness was, and how quickly it would slip between my fingers.

and i was tired
—oh, so fucking tired—
of this reflex.

that's when i started to hang out with my friends again.
that's when i made an effort to smile again.
and that's when things began to change.

so why i believed it was him?
i have no idea.

you probably have a better reason than i do.