her.

vii

christmas, i think, was the beginning of my end

i say that rather ominously
but i'm still alive
and i plan on staying that way

but after christmas, i think i realised the truth
i realised that you are the type to play people
and i had to sort my heart out if i was going to continue being your "best friend"

i hadn't been played, but i may as well have.

i will always cling to that time before christmas
when we were never more than an arm's length apart
when i was all you wanted
—of course, not in the way i thought you did—
and you were all i needed.

i don't know how i'll handle christmas this year.