All The Way From Home

chapter 32

I woke up feeling so unwell with my head pounding and my eyes aching .with all the amount of crying I had done, I really saw it coming

I stood up and stretched a bit then contemplated whether to go out of the room or not , but I don't care anymore . I'm hungry , he should do or say what he wants when he sees me . That is if he's even around

Opening the door after several internal conflicts of :
Open the door
Do not open it
Open it
Do not....

I finally decided to open it and walk out. And as if he who I was avoiding knew i was going to come out evebtually

He was the first thing or person I set eyes on, sitting on the sofa and watching a football match

I dragged my legs and got out some chilled coke from the fridge
Coke is utter blessing !...my thoughts after taking two huge gulps

From my side view , I could see him looking at me but i honestly didn't care anymore

I was bored
I was with MUBARAK of all people to a honeymoon which isn't even one
I had no one to talk to
I was hurt because of what he said to me

And all he was busy doing was watching a football match not caring what i was going through

I want to go home...I might sound like a baby but yes , he isn't making me feel any better . But I should have seen this coming

I'm done with killing myself with boredom...literally
I stood up and matched to the parlour while he acted oblivious to my presence

I quickly grabbed the remote and start to go through channels

"And what do you think you're doing Firdaus ?"
He asked ,finally looking at me

"I want to watch , I'm bored Mubarak"

I say and right now even I know i sound like a whiny baby

"And that is how you should behave right ?"
Moral master ladies and gentlemen
He's no fun I swear

"I knew you wouldn't have agreed even if i asked you "
And truth is...he wouldn't have if i went on the easy way
I'm done going easy...I also have the rights to live and enjoy my stay here

He sighed defeatedly and kept quiet
My cue to change the channel to what i want to watch

Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock

Nothing interesting to watch so i decide to speak out my mind

"Mubarak "
I say looking at him

He just looks at me which indicates i should go on

"I want to go out...isn't that why we travelled ? "

As If i told him something really horrifying...he kept on looking at me without replying

He rubbed his face and then stood up

"Stand up...we're going out "

Wow...who knew he'd actually agree

I knew my face wasn't exactly in the best condition but I couldn't say no to him , so i walked to the the and quickly changed into an abaya and a veil

................

We were finally out ,and even tho he didn't really talk to me I didn't care because I was too excited with the view of Paris

We settled down for a restaurant after going to a lot of boutiques for shopping. But knowing stern face wouldn't allow me to stay long , I quickly bought one or two things and left for other shops

"Merci beucoup"
I say nicely to a the woman giving me croissants

I smile at my croissant before munching it and I tottaly forgot Mubarak was actually there looking at me
Oh , moral master has got something to say about my eating manners ?
Forgive me master Shifu

I internally laugh and he interrupts it by speaking

"Dont you ever get tired of eating ?"
He said while raising an eyebrow

"Who does ?"
I answer, and maybe too quickly

He wanted to talk but then holds it back . I ignored and kept on munching like nothing was really wrong in this marriage

....

Today is our third day in Paris for our so called "honeymoon " and I can't even wait to get back home

Firdaus , your home is now Mubaraks house

I felt so sad remembering I won't be staying at our house anymore but with no other person than MUBARAK

Seriously...this is torture

I need to have fun even without him

I sauntered to the kitchen and decided to make my favourite
Irish potato porridge

After cooking my delicious porridge, I walked up to the the parlor where moral master is
Hah ! I'm starting to like his new name

And talk about the other day he said I was seeking attention...I decided to show him that I don't care so i still wore comfy clothes ,even now

I was wearing a crop top and a pair of shorts
Yes ! Even worse
He should think WHATEVER he wants

I sat down directly accros him and sat in a leg crossing position then settled to eat my porridge

I took a spoon full and couldn't help but say I'm a good chef

Job well done Firdaus

He then stood up and walked to the kitchen
So moral master is hungry too
Well , let's see what he's getting for himself

After some minutes, he walked back in with a bowl of porridge ?
Who thought he'd settle for my food ?
I couldnt help but voice out my thoughts

"I really didnt know you'd eat it "
I say while unfolding my crossed legs
"I was hungry ,nothing much "
He replies nonchalantly

Nothing like..."your food is nice "
"This tastes delicious "

He'd choke himself to death if he compliments me like that as I can see

I ignore his act and walk to the kitchen to wash my bowl and go do my normal routine now

Sleeping

It's at least better than sitting with someone who cant bare to have a full conversation with me

I adjusted on my bed having so many thoughts, then it got interrupted by the noise made due to the door being opened

What could Mubarak possibly come to say or do ?

"Mubarak what do you want ?"

I ask and look at him confused

But he didn't even answer me and went ahead to turn off the lights ?

No..nooo
This can't be happening

I stood up quickly but got held tightly by his strong arms

"This is what you get for putting such skimpy dress in front of me ,and we're in luck we're married. So you see, nothing haram here "
He said huskily in my ear and I couldn't help but get disgusted

Why is he doing this to me ?
What have I ever done ?

Tears started to roll from my eyes but it was useless , it was dark for him to see it and even if he did ...he had already made up his mind for this

He started to kiss me all over and it reminded me of the day he did the same , I don't want any of it

But it was too late
Mubarak already ruined me that night and its something i can never forget