Watch Out

Back Where I Began

Next thing I knew, I was being rushed to the hospital by my mom, which naturally made me worry. I mean, who wouldn't be when your surgeon mom, who has seen countless gunshot wounds, is rushing you to a hospital for a gunshot wound that you never really went to a hospital for anyway. Yes, it technically was treated, but by someone without knowledge of my medical history in a freaking hotel room.

After what felt like hours of waiting in a hospital room, my doctor (not my mom) entered the room where I had been sitting in a hospital bed with my mom right beside me. The look on the doctors face did not make me feel optimistic about what was happening. As he began talking, I felt like my heart was shattering.

"I'm really sorry, y/n...The cancer is back." Those four words broke me. I didn't know what to do. I'd already spent so much of my life in a hospital fighting the cancer. I spent half of my childhood waiting for the doctors to tell me my time was up, then they fixed me. I've been perfectly healthy, minus my stunted growth, for so long, and now it was back?

"B-But...I've been in remission for years! How can it be back so easily?" My voice was shaking as I had flashbacks to all the therapy I had to go through when I was younger. If there was one thing I was scared of happening since I've been put in remission was that it would come back.

My mother was completely stunned. What would you expect from a doctor who has been taking the upmost care in their only child's health? She was just staring off into space as the doctor continued speaking. "It seems that because the wound on your leg wasn't properly taken care of, the cancer cells were able to start growing and multiplying. Thankfully, it was discovered sooner this time than it was last time, so it may be easier to deal with. I would suggest starting the process as soon as possible. I sincerely apologize."

After a moment, he turned to my mom. "Are you alright, Sunah? I know this must be hard on you, but it's the second time, so I'm sure it won't be as difficult. We'll make sure that your daughter is okay."

My mother, finally returning to reality, snapped at the doctor, her coworker. "What do you mean it won't be as difficult? My daughter was on her deathbed for almost three years! Saying something as simple as 'it won't be as difficult' is not enough to console a mother who's daughter has cancer! You can't make me believe that it's all okay. I'm a doctor too, so you should know not to say that bullcrap to me."

I put my hand over hers, trying to calm her down. "Mom...it's okay. Calm down. We overcame it once before, right? If we get upset and angry now, it'll just make it harder to deal with."

My mom took a deep breath before nodding. "Do you want me to call your boyfriend to let him know what's happening?"

I shook my head. "I don't want to worry them, or Sulgi. For now, let's keep it between the hospital and our family. Besides, if the guys found out, they'd blame themselves, and I don't want that."

She gave me a fake smile. I'm sure she thought that it would fool me, but I've seen it before. It was the same smile she had when she found out that if the surgery didn't work all those years ago, I would've died within a few days. I could see how scared she was that I wouldn't survive my cancer relapse, and I was scared to, but seeing the look in her eyes, I decided then and there that I wouldn't show my fear for her. If she saw me being strong, maybe she could feel the same way. She's done so much for me over the years, and I owed her enough to at least pretend to be strong. If I had any reason to beat this again, it would be for her.

Later that day, I called Jeongin to let him know that I was in the hospital, not mentioning the cancer relapse. I lied to him, saying that my mom was just being overprotective and wanted the hospital to monitor me for a day or so. It was completely a lie. She was freaking out about it, and the hospital did want to keep me monitored for a little before I went home.