Her Highness h.s

Chapter 38(Deadly masterpiece)

Songs for this chapter; You Found Me - The Fray & Drew - Love You Like I Always Do & Happy - Leona Lewis

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"Really?" I say to my parents and tilt my head , still hand cuffed as the police men bring me into my house.

"Oh, Liliya, we were so worried," my mother cries, hugging me tightly. - Well, this is uncommon.

My father's lips are pulled into a thin line, as he crosses his arms and observes me carefully.

"I've come to a conclusion," my father starts," since you act like a normal teenager, we're going to treat you like one. You're grounded until you learn to behave." He remarks dryly, glueing his eyes with mine.

I breathe in heavily, trying to calm myself down. They're just trying to push on my nerves, again.

"You do realize that we care about you and that you put yourself into a big risk," Mary utters, while my parents thank the police men and lead them out. I take a moment to study her concerned face, letting out a sigh.

"I'm sorry," I blurt out, my eyes watering. I wasn't tearing up because of them, but because how fucked up I, in reality, really am.

Can't I really show someone that I love them? - Sigh.

I storm into my room, closing the door behind me. This is a sign for everyone, to not disturb me. I jump in my bed, burying my face and drying my tears into my pillow.

How many times have I stained the pillow with tears? - forgive me, dear pillow.

I laugh at my thoughts, boy have I gone crazy. My thoughts are interrupted, eyes turning to the door as I hear knocking.

"Sweetie," Mary calls for me from the door, being careful so that I won't explode and torn the house down.

"Do you want to talk?"

"No."

She ignores my negativity, trying to keep everything coherent as she makes her way to bed. She sits down, locking her eyes to me.

We both stay silence, unsure what to say.

I'm the first one to break the silence, "Do you believe in love, Mary?" I don't know what on earth possessed me to ask that question.

"Oh, yes. I did, and I still do. Even after Jonah died, I haven't stopped loving him and I still think about him, every single day." She smiles at the memory, looking up at the ceiling.

"Oh," I flush and smile. - So, that's love, huh? She never told me how his husband died, but I guess it's not none of my bussiness.

"You won't forget your first love...." she continues," there is a certain magic about one's first love, it's like a spell put upon you, painful spell that doesn't have an expiration day. They always say that first cut is the deepest and they couldn't be more right. I still feel the hurt in my heart," she presses her palm on her chest.

"In the end of the day, the truth is that we don't stop loving the people who were precious to us, we just learn to live without them. We have to learn because it's not a choice but a twist of fate, forcing you to move on."

I flutter my eyes close, another question popping into my head. - Jeez, calm down, my subconscious snapts at me.

"Can I ask you another question?" I shyly ask, still mesmerized from her long speech.

"Go ahead, darling."

"How did you confess your feelings to your erm, husband?" I look for any signs of discomfort, but letting out a breath of relief when there isn't any.

"Ah, just thinking about those times warms my heart," she smiles, placing hand on her shoulder, rubbing it.

"We had seen each others for a long time and I knew that my time had come to confess my feelings to him, but I wasn't sure if I was fully ready. There's a thing about telling someone you love them, you toss your heart into their palms and trust them enough for them not to crush it. Love is literally like a gamble, either you lose everything or gain everything you could wish for. I wasn't really the type to take risks, but when it came to love, it made me fearless."

I nodded, slowly gulping. This was all new to me, no one had ever opened up like this on the topic of love. Maybe, this could actually help me with my issue with Harry.

"So, one day we were both laying down on a sofa with Jonah, and suddenly out of nowhere I gained the courage to wear my heart on my sleeve and confess my longing feelings to him. Jonah was really surprised, and maybe even scared. Patience was the key, and eventually he said it back, making me the happiest woman alive.

Even if you're hundred per cent sure about loving someone, it's not easy to speak your thoughts out loud. Nobody's afraid of love, we're afraid of losing that person, or letting that person see us in the most vulnerable state and then taking advantage of us. We're afraid of rejection."

"Love can be either a curse or a blessing, for me it was the second one until he returned back to God. But, I'm still grateful for everything I had, and still have in life."

I begin sobbing again, not being able to keep my tears hidden.

"Oh, don't cry, darling. All good things does come to an end. And, you can't be sad because it's over, you have to smile because that certain that made you happy in your life happened." I nod, wiping my tears away.

"I bet you'll find your prince charming prince riding on his white horse, coming to get you and who knows maybe he's closer than you know."

Mary excuses herself after that, and left with my wondering thoughts.

My phone vibrates on the table, I reach out for it. Answering the phone, I'm greeted with Harry's raspy voice.

"How are you?!"

"I'm fine." I lie. In reality I'm anything but fine right now.

"Do you want to talk about what happened? I'm here for you, remember that."

I stay silence, thinking about what to reply.

"Or we could see somewhere, now?"

"I'd love to. But, I'm grounded."

"But-"

"I'll be there in 5," he utters and hangs up.

That's when I knew that I had found the one, but I'm not sure if he is a prince charming in a shining armour, because he isn't a prince and his armour is made of foil, but it's certain that me and him combined together will be a deadly masterpiece that I'll never get tired of. And surely, I'm scared that he'll tore it up someday, but for now strangely I don't seem to care.

I need and have to say these thoughts out loud to him.

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