I think we all get to a point where we ask ourselves if we're fulfilling our purpose in life,if it's the right roller coaster,if we're even supposed to be riding.This question becomes harder to answer when everyone else seems to be exceeding beyond your point.
Especially being a young women growing up,not that men don't ask the same question just in a sense of as,teenage girls our mindset has almost been rearranged for us to associate so much more along with the question of our purpose.
Like how the world has secretly told girls that we have to compete against each other,this automatically makes us compare ourselves,how we dress,how we eat,what we look ,where we come from and now even how we're riding our roller coaster in life.
A while back I was talking to my friend Lesego,she was explaining how she feels like she isn't really doing anything with her life and everyone else is.
I told her to sit tight,I'd write her a letter.
I knew exactly what Lesego needed to hear at that moment,but I knew she needed something she could keep reading over and over again also the letter system is just so cute.
Please tell me you still write letters every now and again please,it's really just fun it brings out an innocence in you.whether you write to your mom,boyfriend or just your girls.
That's besides the point,I go off track a lot in this book so bear with me.
So what I'm about to share is basically the letter I wrote Lesego front to back really,although I changed some of the wording cause I initially used the terms 'running your own race',but I felt like it was over used and didn't describe enough of how hard,how fun and how long life's journey can become.
How do I ride my roller coaster when it feels like we're competing,but they're winning?
Firstly you need to recognize that the roller coaster ride you're riding is your ride alone,that it's designed specifically for you.Designed to prepare you for the next ride.It has its own obstacles,it's own length,it's own comfortability.Therefore it would be completely unfair to compare your ride to anyone else's ride.
Secondly due to our purpose in life being different our pre-roller coaster ride will be completely different to prepare us accordingly.
I recently experienced this overwhelming question when a friend of mine also started a campaign.(we became friends after she started it)The campaign was called "Girls glow and grow"(G&G).Initially I loved the campaign,but they were doing what we were doing a bit better,I felt at times.
I felt a sense of envy, overwhelmed to a point where I would even lie about that campaign to some people,at that point my ride on the inside out roller coaster almost completely stopped.I had to sit down and re-evaluate myself and what I was doing,what example I was showing and why exactly I started inside out in the first place.
I was so stuck looking at the progress of Murungy and G&G that I had jeopardized inside out and put it on the 'dajavu' ride.
Thirdly this ride we're all on means individual winners so we can all be first place,but the only catch comes with the fact that we're so stuck staring at other people's rides(achievements,family,business,school,work,body,power,influence)we either begin to mimic their race or completely forget to run ours.
This was one of the best realizations for me getting this in my brain meant that both G&G and Inside Out could help girls and it wouldn't matter who got the most girls,had the most followers it would just be the fact that we'd be reaching a common goal.
Another example is a friend of mine, known as PatricKxxlee.As I was writing the book we started talking and I asked if he felt anxious to release music into the world and he replied yes.I then asked what caused the anxiety he said,"giving a part of yourself away to the world."
I would have expected him to say something like how the fans would receive it,or comparisons to his competitors.
This immediately took my mind to the difference in mindsets between females and males.
I'm a poet, so whenever I perform my poetry I always think of how my audience will receive it and what other poets will think.
As girls I believe we strongly need to renew our minds on a daily basis.
I have a quote by Nikita Gill: "If all girls were taught how to love each other fiercely instead of how to compete with each other and hate their own bodies,what a different and beautiful world we would live in."
How do I renew my mind, teach my self to stop running a race against competitors that aren't racing with me?
You need to evaluate what type of food your mind is taking in.
Let's be real. Right when you're about to go on a roller coaster, you don't eat a lot or eat random foods...because we all know what's going to happen if you do that.
We take in so much of what the world is saying which is why it becomes so easy for us as girls to believe that we're in competition with every other girl in the world.
Magazines, television, music and so many people are telling us or showing us that as females we to compete and that's the food your feeding your mind with.
We wonder why we find ourselves comparing rides even without noticing at times. And it's because, 'You are what you eat.'
My friend Sihle once read a note, her mom sent her that said, "The reason we sometimes feel like we haven't had a productive day is because we haven't done anything that will enhance our vision or gone to places that will make us happy."
Do things that make you happy, if you're competing in a race (that isn't really a race) against another girl then you're bound to not find time to go to your happy place, or be productive in your day.
It just made me think as well, if you surround yourself with people that want your roller coaster to reach its highest point: The roller coaster is bound to be easier, because there are people you can always count on or turn to push your roller coaster on days when it won't move.
Feed your mind with quotes such as the one Sihle's mom sent her.
Your here to ride you'r roller coaster so stop comparing rides,stop staring,stop judging,stop trying to be someone your not and focus on your ride!
@girlsgrowandglow on IG
@insideouteventsa on IG
Patrickxxlee ig
SoundCloud
You may find my email and Instagram at the end of the 1st chapter feel free to ask questions and please tell me if you do find any errors😊
@girlsgrowandglow on IG
@insideouteventsa on IG
@Patrickxxlee on IG
bit.ly/PxxGhostsLoveMe. Here's a link for you to listen to Patrick's music✨✨
I hope your enjoying the book so far,but mostly that it's making some kind of impact.
