Are You Happy Now?

entry nine.

I felt better today, thanks to Simon yesterday. I kept my head up a smile on my face. I took my medication today. I let my hair fall down on my shoulders instead of in a tight bun. You said my bun made me look too sophisticated and stuck up. I bet your dumbass don't even know what sophisticated even means. I put on some makeup and looked in the mirror. Who am I? I didn't recognise myself. I hadn't seen this side of me since it happened. 

I saw you at school and you were surprised at how good I looked. Even Stephen complimented me as he hugged me. It felt like I was stuck in my first day everyone looked at me. But in a good way. I had strangers say I looked good and that they preferred me with makeup not in a rude way. But it did bother me seeing as I shouldn't have to rely on makeup to make people like me. I was me and I loved myself. Makeup or not. Hair up or down. 

But then you came and tried to make me feel worthless. Calling me a slag and saying that I'm wearing makeup for unnecessary attention. I told you to fuck off and reminded you that your girlfriend coats her face in makeup so anything you call me you're saying to her. 

"At least my girl friend ain't a slut like you," You say. I laugh.

I didn't really give a fuck and walk off with Stephen. I seemed to be happy the rest of the day and I overall was, but I was bored of hearing the same thing come from your dumbass self.