Love Yourself: Suga | The Last

Six

-Suga-

Suga hesitates at Hana's door after he shuts it behind him, leaning his head against the cold wall. Having her at such a close proximity to him constantly was enough to make his palms sweat and his ears ring. The truth was that he was afraid of being so open with her even after all these years. He didn't expect to actually really care about her, but he found himself wanting to make sure she was taken care of.

Just like he had promised years ago.

Suga breathes out and runs a hand through his blonde hair. He felt like he could sleep for a week straight. The last two days proved to be some of the most exhausting days he ever went through and he didn't even have to do back to back concerts.

He pushes away from the wall and walks the short distance to his own room in the other hallway. Namjoon's door is still wide open and he can hear JHope's voice as well talking about the song they were both trying to write. Suga walks to the open door and peeks in, the two younger boys looking up at him.

"Ah, Suga hyung, how did it go?" Namjoon presses a button on the computer and the music stops. "She asleep?"

Suga yawns and rubs a palm against his eye. "Dunno. Hopefully she sleeps soon, she doesn't sleep very well," Suga says, trying to stifle another yawn.

"Maybe you should be getting some sleep too, hyung. You look like you could pass out at any second," Jhope says.

Suga nods. "I'll get some sleep after I find something small to eat. I haven't had anything since I was on the plane."

Namjoon gets up and hands Suga a glass of water. "At least drink this while you stand here, you're seriously looking a bit pale." Suga takes the glance gratefully and sips at the water to please Namjoon. "We're going to have to talk about it sooner or later, I hope you know that," Namjoon says to him sternly.

"I figured. Let's just talk about it now then," Suga breathes out, walking over to the bed and sitting on the edge. He places the cup of water on the table, ignoring the dirty looks from Jhope and Namjoon. "Well?" He prompts.

But the two boys shake their heads. "You know the deal, Suga. We talk things out as a team. The other four are going to want to be a part of this. We can grab them now if you want, but I was trying to give you the courtesy of some sleep first," Namjoon explains, sounding exactly like the leader they all knew him to be.

Suga groans and lets himself fall backwards on to the bed. He stares up at the white ceiling. "What have I gotten myself into?" He says quietly, letting his eyes slide shut. He puts a hand on his face, blocking out the light behind his eyelids. "She's just a girl."

Namjoon chuckles and sits beside Suga. "You made a promise, Suga, you have to honor it. It doesn't matter if it's through text or face to face. You promised him that you'd keep her safe. You and I both know you don't go back on your promises."

"I know, and I still think about it every day," Suga mutters, opening his eyes when flashes of the past start filling the dark space. "It's been years and it still haunts me."

JHope walks over and sits on the other side of Suga, giving him a small smile. "You're going to have to tell her sometime, Suga. She deserves to know," he says and Suga stills. "If I were in her position...I'd want to know."

Suga sits up and looks at his younger friend. "I was close to telling her multiple times today, but every time he's even mentioned she gets this blank look on her face. I can't even begin to understand how I should bring up his death without her having some kind of breakdown. I'm worried she'll just try and kill herself again."