Roses are red, My name is not Dave, This poem makes no sense... Microwave.
*Taking picture of friend* Me: Alright smile!!! Friend: Did you take it yet? Me: Oh crap! It's on video!!
The first person who had hiccups must have been scared as hell...
Teacher:Today we're watching a movie!!! Students:YAY!! Teacher:So take out a paper and pen, we're taking notes. Students: Freak! -.-
I'm so good at sleep, I can do it with my eyes closed.. *snaps fingers in "z" formation*
"Hey can I have a sip?" "Sure!" *GULP GULP GULP* "Dude what the hell!!"
In scary movies, the person yells out, "Hello." As if the bad guy is going to be like, "Yeah, I'm in the kitchen, want a sandwich?"
"We need to talk" is the scariest thing someone could ever say.
*Washing hands* *Sleeve starts falling down* NOOOOOO!!!
That dirty look you give the sidewalk when you turn around after you trip over it.
Has anyone else wanted to get in a taxi and yell "FOLLOW THAT CAR!"
*Taking a test*.... If the answer is false, please explain. Answer: True
"You're it!" "Screw you! I'm not playing anymore."
When your name is in a math problem? Class*stares at me* Me: That's right b*tches, i bought 60 watermelons."
"K" .... K? HOW ABOUT YOU GET RUN OVER BY A TRAIN AND I'LL BE LIKE, "K".
That "Fail in life" moment when your trying to pull up the covers and you punch yourself in the face.
The awkward moment, when you trip over nothing.
The awkward moment when you wake up and think, where he hell did my pillow go?
When you drop something in front of you, and it completely disappears of the face of the earth.
If I was stranded on a deserted island and I could only bring one thing, I would bring Dora, she has everything in that backpack!
Flickering lights? 30% An electric problem 70% Someone's gonna get killed.
I am SO PROUD OF MYSELF!!! I just finished a jigsaw puzzle! It only took me 6 months.. and the box said 2-4 years! HA! I sure showed them!
Slamming the door shut, so everybody in the house knows you're pissed off.
I don't think I could ever stab someone.. I barely can get the straw in a Capri Sun.
Person: What do you want for your birthday? Me: *Forgets everything I have ever wanted*
"How did you get that scar?" "Well.. I was all like, Come at me bro.. and he did"
Ok, ok, I'm serious now... LONG PAUSE *bursts out laughing*
When you start to hate someone, everything they do begins to annoy you. Them: *Cough* Me: "Ohhhh my god!"
Mission Impossible? Not answering a stupid question with a sarcastic answer.
I hate people who say age is just a number... age is clearly a word.
"Maybe you should read the instruc-" . . . NAH! I GOT THIS!!
That annoying moment when someone enters your room and leaves the door wide open when they leave.
I'm the kind of person who stops the microwave at 1 second just to feel like a bomb defuser.
Person dies in movie; "Eh, they probably deserved it." Puppy dies in movie: "WHAT THE FREAK! WHAT DID THE PUPPY DO!?!"
Trying to kill a spider but I missed, then saying to myself: "It's gonna kill me in my sleep."
That moment when you say "WHO THE F*CK TOOK MY... oh, here it is..."
Those girls on "My Super Sweet 16" that get pissed when there dad buys them the wrong car, B*tch, I don't even own a bike.
The awkward moment when you've said "What?" 5 times and still have no idea what the person is saying so you just smile and say Yeah.
*Drop something* *pick it up* *drop it again* WTF!
Blanket on TOO hot. Blanket off, TOO cold. 1 leg out? Perfect! Until the demon from Paranormal Activity grabs it and drags you down the hall.
When you drop your pen/pencil? 3% Right where you dropped it. 5% 10 feet away from you 92% into another dimension never to be seen again.
The best kinds of laughter. 1) Laughing so hard that your laugh becomes silent 2) Feeling a 6 pack coming. 3) Tears coming out of your eyes.
When my pen is empty? 5% I calmly get a new one 95% Scribble, Scribble, Scribble.
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Alright! I will add more every time I update, well obviously! Sorry talk to myself sometimes.. I think I'm talking to myself right now... eh.. who cares.. But THIS WAS PART 1 OF THE LOL BOOK.... um.... uh.... PINEAPPLES!!
SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!!! Or the next time I upload... which is like a day or so...
~Sarah ;) *wink wink* :P
