As Much as You {completed}

Carmen: 17.

 

                                                                   Packing the last of the things that she’d gotten out since her visit, Carmen turned towards her bag, and as she was about to put it all in, she caught sight of her reflection in the mirror of the room she was staying in. Caught off guard again with the fact that her eyes weren’t what they normally were, and had plenty of brown mixed in, she didn't realise that her charger was slipping from atop the pile of clothes until it hit her foot. Cursing under her breath, she threw her clothes into her case and then bent down to pick up her charger. Just as she straightened herself, her mobile ran and she pushed her hand into her pocket to answer it.

                "Hello?"

                "Gretchen." Carmen replied, feeling relieved that she had someone to talk to. Guilia had gone to Asda's to get some groceries, Peter was down in his workshop, maturing apple juice, adding ingredients to make cider, and Vincent was out with his girlfriend. The only person left was Ezra, and she certainly wasn't going to talk to him. "How are you?"

                "I'm more bothered about how you're feeling! People have been asking about you. The paps haven't taken a photo of you for a couple of days so people think you've literally fallen of the face of the earth. Did everything go okay? Did you make up?"

                Something in Carmen's stomach twisted and she grimaced, taking a seat on the bed. "It was bad, Gretch."

                "What happened, Love?" Gretchen could be a pain in Carmen's backside sometimes, got jobs for her that were weird, but she wasn't just a colleague, but also a friend.

                "As soon as his face landed on me, he turned nasty and told me to get out."

                "So he recognised you straight away?"

                "Yeah..."

                "Well that's a good thing! It's a start!"

                Carmen shook her head, even though Gretchen couldn't see through the receiver. Then she sighed. "No. He doesn't remember me. He recognised me. From television. A programme, or a film or something."

                "Oh, Carmen, I'm so sorry."

                "It's okay," she replied in an Eeyore voice.  "I came here on a whim. I learned my lesson."

                "But you wouldn't have known if you didn't go, though. Think about this positively. What does Kevin think?"

                "I haven't spoken to him since I got here. He's been doing night shifts."

                "Well I can take Harrison one night if you want."

                "It's okay," Carmen replied quietly, smiling just a little at how supportive her friend was. "I'm leaving to come home now."

                She was ready to come home, to her friends, family, and on-set personalities. The life she has now is the life she wouldn't have had - Carmen thought when she finally decided she was going to leave –  if Ezra never got in a car that day, but he did, and this is her life now. And because she treasured it dearly, she was able to leave this all behind. Remember how her and Ezra used to be, and smile at how she'll always be able to recall her first love, even if he couldn't.