Free yet trapped

Chapter 1: Back to reality.

       Cat:

I look at him, then at my bloody paws, and then at him again. I take in my claws. Not this again, it's too difficult to cope with my wild side. I try to turn my paws back to hands concentrating hard on them, but it's useless, it's too early to change yet.

I stretch out to him and place my paw on his neck, feeling for a heartbeat. Shit. There is none... so, I sit back where I was, not knowing what to do.

My cat ear twitches, warning me that someone is coming, but I already knew... his scent is unmistakable, even with the smell of blood everywhere.

He opens the door suddenly. "Cat", he whispers. I hear him gasp at the sight of the bloody scene, and is taken back by it. I turn around to face him, his coffee coloured puppy eyes revealing fear, his tail hidden between his legs too. I lower both my eyes and ears, I can't stand him making me feel guilty.

He 'wakes up' from his shock, and runs to kneel besides me "Caty, what happened? Are you OK? Are you hurt?" He asks in a rush, as he carefully moves a lock of my hair and places it where my human ear would be, but since it's not there, because I'm in cat form, it falls right where it was, in front of my eye.

"I'm fine, he's not", I say, emotionless. He looks at the body I'm referring to, and moves to check the non-existent blood pressure.

He lets out a sigh, his ears drop in pity. "Caty... ", he whispers, not knowing what to say next.

He moves back to where he was, right beside me. "You really lost it this time", he says, softly. I look away, I know I lost control, I don't need him to remind me... it only hurts more.

"I know, and it doesn't even come with a warning! If only I could tell when it comes... something! Anything! Like the Moon. But no! ... I just know that I might change into a huge cat during sunset and I'll lose control over my body! Killing anything that dares to cross my path", I say frustrated as I look down.

He sighs. "Kitty... ", he says taking my face in his hands and forcing me to look at him, his eyes show pity and sorrow. He wants to help me, but there is nothing he can do.

He buries his hands in my fur and strokes my ear gently, his touch calming down the chaos inside my head. He closes in slowly and his lips meet with mine in a slow but short kiss, the sweet chocolate flavor of his mouth shutting down all the worries I already forgot I had.

I lied, there is something he can do.