Letters Back Home

Chapter Three

It was 3:30 when my phone woke me from a deep sleep. I didn't bother to check who it was because of how tired I was.

"Hello?" I groggily answered. I could hear heavy breathing on the other side of the phone so I repeated myself. "Hello?" This time sitting up in my bed as I leaned against the headboard. I wiped my eyes in an attempt to wake myself up.

Finally there was a man's voice on the other end. "Hey." He said. Still half asleep I let the voice register slowly in my mind before replying.

As it clicked in my head I was jolted awake. "Nick?" I replied. Again there was a pause before I got an answer.

"It's me honey." He said. I was instantly thrown into a world of missing him. I began to tear up but didn't allow it to mess with my speech.

"Are you okay?" I asked. He never normally took this long to talk to me so I knew something had to have been wrong.

"I uh..." He started eventually. "There was an attack...on a city we were patrolling....a bomber." He said in ending. It was a little hard for me to hear so I pulled the phone closer into my ear and blocked the other ear with my finger.

"Yeah. I saw the news yesterday morning. Are you alright?" I said choking to hear his response. I couldn't bare to hear it, but I wanted to.

"Yea." He said with a big sigh. I could tell in his voice he had only said that for me not to worry. "No." He eventually said as he knew he couldn't get away with lying to me. "It was one of my privates, Private Luther was caught in the aftermath and I carried him away from it all." I could hear his voice get hitched. "Honey, it was so...bad." He said after sucking in some breath. I could tell his voice was catching as he spoke, which meant he was crying.

"It's alright honey. You don't need to say anymore." I almost whispered through the speaker as I had tears rolling down my eyes.

"I held him in my arms Samantha. I had him right there looking into my eyes." He almost never used my full name unless it was dire. I could tell this had really hurt him. "I radioed in to command and they said the chopper would be there in 15 minutes tops." He then took a couple minutes before going on. "They came 3 hours later as I held his dying wish." His voice now became traced with anger and he chuckled angrily. "3 hours Sammy? I don't understand..." He took a break as I covered my hand to my mouth to cover the sobbing. My eyes were blinded with tears. "I just want to come home." He said trailing off.

"I know sweetheart. Me too. I want you to come home." He sighed after I spoke.

When I heard voices in the background and the line began to get fuzzy I knew what was coming. "Honey I love--" the line then became silent.

"Nick?" I asked into the phone not wanting to believe the silence. "Nick?" I more sternly said into the phone, more tears escaping my eyes. When I realized there was going to be no voice I ended my call and held my phone to my forehead. Leaning into it I cried and closed my eyes until my alarm went off at 5:45. I turned it off as I wiped my nose clean of any snot that had trailed down my face. I then halfheartedly got out of my bed and walked towards the sink in the bathroom. I turned on the faucet and washed my face with warm water. I splashed my face until I felt I could be strong again.

Standing tall and looking at myself in the mirror I realized the black bags that had formed underneath my eye lids. I then continued to get ready for the day not bothering to look at the news or even turning on the TV. I walked through the kitchen, in my work clothes and made tea. I then put it all in my black thermos after the kettle whistled and headed out the door. I seemed to be in my own little world. Rolling with the events of the day and not reacting.