I Can't Stop [Niam]

Chapter 21

I'm back to my laptop and I have internet access...for now at least. Sorry for the long updates, hopefully this chapter makes up for it.

Also, for those of you who read my other stories, what would you guys like me to update next?

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People’s families have been streaming in and out the door sense ten this morning. It’s about one in the afternoon now and mine still has yet to show. Visiting ends at five today, but I know they’ll be there. Greg’s my brother and he loves me, he wouldn’t just miss family day. I didn’t get a chance to read his email on what time he would be coming because I was too busy sending one to Liam. He could literally be here any minute and that’s making me nervous.

I have no clue how he’s going to react when he sees me. Is he going to proud that I’ve gained some weight and had made some progress? Is he going to be upset that I had relapsed all because of a guy? Did he miss me or was he happy that I was no longer around to bother him and Denise?

What’s making me more nervous is anticipating whether Liam’s going to come or not. I really don’t know how I would feel if he were to come. I mean, of course I’ll be happy if he shows, but I’m still also really hurt that he hasn’t been answering my e-mails. He would need a really good reason as to why he hasn’t been answering me, but can I really handle that reason?

In a way, it would almost be easier if he doesn’t show up. I would know it was over and get some closure from that. He could finally find someone that’s better, someone who isn’t fucked up and in a mental ward, someone that is worthy of being with him. I would eventually get over him, which I doubt will ever happen because of how much I love, and be able to fully focus on fixing myself…if I can be fixed.

Yeah, the anticipation is killing me.

I was broke from my thoughts by a body dropping next to mine on the floor against the wall of the hang out center, that’s where were supposed to meet our families. The person’s hand dropped onto my knee and started rubbing comforting circles. I glanced up to be met with the hazel eyes of Ashton. He sent me a small, comforting smile. “They’ll be here.”

I sighed and looked back down at my lap. “It’s not them I’m worried about.” I said before glancing back at him.

He nodded and gave me an encouraging smile. “I know. I mean they’ll all be here.”

Well, he has a lot more faith then I do. “Where’s your family?” I asked, trying to change the subject.

His smile immediately dropped and he quickly retracted his hand and started twiddling his thumbs. “They’re not coming. Everyone I’m close with is here.” He said, his voice sounding almost cold.