The blankets on my bed envelope me in their warmth as I stare at the blank walls all around me.
I hear a brief knock followed by the door opening and Luke, Ashton, Calum and Mikey walking in with piles of take-away in their hands.
"We brought breakfast." Ashton says weakly as I turn in my bed and face yet another blank wall.
"I don't want it." I reply in a mumble as I feel the bed dip behind me and a reassuring hand on my waist.
"You need to get up before we lose our rehearsing time. The concert is tomorrow Shay." Calum says calmly as I hear him wander around my room.
I grumble in response and roll back over facing the boys who have opened up the bags of food and begun digging into the muffins and hash browns.
The smell of grease and bacon is enough to drag me out of bed so I flick the covers off and shuffle over to my cupboards where I grab a pair of black jeans, a black tied dye tee with hints of blue and red stained in it, and a leather jacket with silver studs all over it, before walking into the bathroom and getting changed out of my simple pyjamas into the change of clothes.
I then walk back out and find the boys sitting on the floor of my room still eating so I sit down with them and begin to eat a BLT muffin that was sitting in the pile of food sitting there.
I don't make conversation with the boys for the whole time we sit there so once I finish eating, I rise to my feet and search around for my black boots with silver studs in them which I then slide on and walk into the bathroom.
I'm halfway through tying my hair into a loose bun on the top of my head when Luke walks in and watches me with keen eyes as I flick the hair-tie around the base of the knot and pull it apart a bit to make it look more lazy.
"Are you just gonna stand there and watch me get ready?" I question sassily as he cocks his head to the side and says with a broken voice, "You cut yourself?"
My face goes blank as I stare at the man behind me.
"I did a long time ago." I mutter hollowly as I pick up my toothbrush and begin to squirt on a bit of paste.
He just watches me like I'm a puzzle he's trying to piece together whilst I brush my teeth and try not to stare back at the person behind me. I spit the foamy paste into the basin and wash it down before rinsing my brush and placing it into the decorative cup beside the basin.
I turn and face Luke and say, "What are you so interested in?"
"Those ones near you wrist seem reasonably new." He mutters as he steps closer to me and takes a hold of my wrists.
He slides the sleeves of my jacket up as I look away from him and listen to his sharp intake of breath. He brushes his thumb across them gently and I wince slightly at the pain that remains.
"Why?" He asks simply, his longer hair drooping down over his eyes.
"Why what?" I reply simply as I take my arms out of his grip and push my sleeves back down.
"Why did you do it? Why didn't you tell us? Why would you cut yourself?" He asks, the pieces of his puzzle clear to me now.
"1, because it felt right. 2, because you guys would baby me over it. 3, because of what Mum said. I'm useless, a waste of space. She's always been right and I've had to deal with it every god damned day of my life Luke." I explain as I cross my arms over my chest and watch him with a cocked head as he looks up at me through shadowed eyes.
"You know we care about you Shay. We would never baby you, you are your own woman. But this... You can't be doing this to yourself." Luke says quietly.
YOU ARE READING
Ghost Of You *SLOW UPDATES*
Fanfic"You left me alone. How can I forgive you for that?" ///// Shayla Holmes has always felt music was a part of her identity. It's what kept her sane throughout her high-schooling life. So when she gets accepted into Scintilla Music Academy, she jumps...
