our let it be ( Katsudeku)

5

Hurts... 
It really does hurt to be left behind by those you thought who would never ever left you no matter what. Forgotten by someone you could never forget was like trying to know someone you have never met. It stings,  like applying salt into the wounds.   It hurts because you know you can do nothing to change it,  have no rights  to complain since no matter how much something  or someone means to you,  at the end of the day,  it still doesn't matter especially if the said person wants nothing to do with you anymore. 

Izuku,  or deku knew this.  He had long ago figured out what might had happened  between him and his beloved best friend ever since that day that the blonde had lied to him.  He knew,  and watched how slowly,  bit by bit,  his friend had started to move away from within his reach.It was like holding a ballon that is being blew away by the wind.  At first,  you try your hardest to maintain,  to hold on to the ballon,  but since the threat is too thin and slippery,  as well as add the fact that the wind was strong,  no matter how much you held into it,  it will still fly away. 

No matter how hard he looked at the tragedy  that had happened to their friendship,  he still couldn't figured out what had went wrong. What he had did for them to end this way.  Was it maybe katsuki's fault?  Or maybe him?  If so,  what was it that made a crack on their once unbreakable friendship?

A sudden flashback of him,  trying to help the blonde to stand up after he had fell into the water of the River him and the blonde had passed by.
After the said incident,  the blonde had started to became harsh and violent towards him.  As if the green headed's existence sickens him. 

He tried to figured out what wrong he might have did or said but still  couldn't figures it out. him
Was it wrong to care for someone you truly love?  Was it wrong to feel worry and concern for them? 
Now years had passed,  it was very dare he say ironic.  Everything became ironic to him.  Like how much his best friend,  oh sorry,  former best friend had change.  Funny to see his former number one protector to be now his number one bully.  From former best friend to now torturer.  The safe and contented feelings he felt whenever he was with the blonde before was now replace with fear,  and anxiety.  Feelings he never thought would deem possible when he is with katsuki.

Before,  katsuki was the only person who izuku would always want to be with but now,  being alone with katsuki became a sudden reality of what seems to be a nightmare.  Nightmare of humiliation,  none stop picking on him. It hurts to have your trust ,love,  and respect for someone be easily disregarded as if it was trash by the said person.

He knew sulking about their failed friendship would bring him nothing but pain, so he moved on from it. After all, his life, his world doesn't just revolve around katsuki. He still have his mother. His mother than never gave up on him. She keeps a strong facade around izuku but then he knew she was struggling in the inside. Raising a kid all on your own is a quite challenge for a single mother. That's why he decided to help her in his own little ways.

Getting some different kinds of legal job was a bit easy for the green headed male since he was known at their community as the kind hearted kid who would do any thing just to help his mother. He have atleast three different jobs, all day. In his opinion, finding a job was quite easier but maintaining or keeping them is on a different level since he had to adjust his body and mind into different works. From a newspaper boy early in the morning, to a student at 8:30 ,then to a cashierer at a small convenience store near their school. Earning money was too damn hard for his opinion that is why he salute his mother being able to secure their needs all alone before. Since his father seems like disappeared out of the blue.

But his father doesn't matter now, all he need to do is to finish his studies and earn money. Tiring but he will make it , not just for him but for her. His mother who deserves everything that the world can offer. Aside from his multiple works, being bullied by katsuki and his group of friends is what he also encounters on a daily basis. He didn't knew what the blonde was gaining from such acts but he had no time to care. After all,in his eyes, the katsuki he knew was long gone. Buried six feet underground and cannot be revive. His burns and cuts that were caused by the said male was all the evidences he have to finally sink into his poor broken heart that the katsuki he knew was long dead.he stopped calling him kacchan since he consider the blonde now someone as he will never be close to.