Starting New - Xxxtentacion

Chapter 25 - That Was Not Love

Why did I agree to come here? I've been asking myself since I got here. I sighed as I just stood next to Ki. I lost Isaiah and if I can't find him so I may kill him later. Him and Ki dragged me to this party. They begged me and I agreed because I was bored and haven't been to a party in forever so I thought why not. Well, now I regret it.

I wanted Jahseh to come with us, but he wanted to stay home and make some new songs. He wasn't really feeling like partying tonight. Now suddenly I'm not either. But I'm not going to complain or say anything to Ki or Isaiah because they're having fun and I don't want to ruin it.

"Hey Ki Ima go outside for a few" I told him as I grabbed onto his arm. He looked down at me.

"Ight you okay?" He asked me. I smiled slightly and nodded.

"Just a lot of people in here. That's all" I answered him.

"I'll come with you-"

"No it's fine. Have fun. I'll be right" he nodded so I turned around and walked outside. I took a deep breathe and looked around. Cars are lined up on the street and only a few people are out here.

"Haven't seen you at a party in a while" I heard a voice say from behind me. I looked back to see Trevon walking towards me. I just nodded. I don't want to see him right now. "How are you?"

"Why do you care?" I snapped at him. He chuckled.

"Ight still stubborn" He mumbled. "So who's your nigga now? Xxxtentacion or Skies? Or is it one of the other niggas you living with?" He asked with a laugh.

"Why are you bothering me, Trevon? Why even come up to me?" I asked getting annoyed.

"Come on, you're glad I did. You for sure missing me" He ask grabbing my hand. I stepped back and pulled my hand away quickly.

"The fuck you grabbing me for?" I yelled at him. I truly hate him. Some of the people outside looked at us since I yelled at him. I don't get a fuck though. He pisses me off every time I see him.

"Shut the fuck up" he mumbled to me as he looked back at me after looking around.

"I want nothing to do with you. Leave me alone Trevon" I said to him. He chuckled.

"Please I was probably the best you could ever have" he said making me laugh.

"That's actually hilarious that you think that. You think you so tough and such a hot shot. You too cocky. You were the worst I ever had. I wasted my time with you. All you did was cheat on me and lie to me" I yelled at him.

"The fuck? I loved your bitch ass!" He yelled back.

"You didn't love me Trev. That was not love. You cheated on me. You lied to me. You hurt me. You hit me-" he cut me off.

"That was once-" I cut him off.

"You still hit me. Once, twice, don't matter how many times it was. You still put your hands on me. If Ki didn't show up to my house, I'm sure you would have beat me worse. If we didn't lie to him and say I was sleeping when he came, you woulda gotten beat by him and my fucking brother. I saved your ass. I didn't have too. I lied for you so many times. I fucking cared about you. I wish I didn't. I wish I never met you. I wish you never came up to me at school after that stupid fight I had with that girl. You had to ask me if I was okay. You had to offer to drive me home. Meet my family who loved you more than they loved me. You had me fooled. I thought the feelings from your end were real for all those months-" he cut me off.

"Stas they were-"

"I don't want to hear it" I said shaking my head.

"What's going on?" I heard Kis voice. I looked over to see him walking up to us with Isaiah and some other kid I don't know.

"Nothing" I answered first.

"We were just- nothing. Nothing" Trevon said shoving his hands in his pocket and looking down at the ground.

"Ight well I'm tryna leave" Ki told me. I nodded.

"Wait just give us one more minute" Trevon said making me look back up at him. I sighed and nodded agreeing.

"We'll be at the car" Isaiah told and they started walking down the front lawn. They said goodbye to that kid and got in the car. The car was parked right there so Trevon knows not to fight with me anymore or they'll come back.

"You think you were the only one hiding shit to protect someone?" Trevon asked me with a quiet tone.

"What are you talking about? I never did anything that you needed to hide-" he cut me off.

"I'm not talking about you Stas. I'm talking about Skies" he started. I looked at him confused.

"If it's about his feelings for me" I trailed off as he shook his head.

"Well a little bit of that too. I knew he liked you. Before you and I got together. But I didn't care since y'all were just friends and we connected. But do you remember who told you that I cheated on you? Not him right?" He asked me.

"A few people knew so they told me. Ki didn't know till I told him" I said making Trevon chuckle and shake his head.

"Oh he knew. He was there for some of the times. I know it's weird talking about my mistakes that I made. I know how it was really fucked up to do that to you and I'm sorry I realize that now. I was just really fucked up on the xans I guess. But anyway, he was there half of the times and always said he'd tell nobody. When we broke up, he told me it was better off that way and that I shouldn't care" he told me.

I started to get really annoyed. Do I believe him? They were and still are best friends so I do believe him. It makes sense.

"Are you being for real?" I asked him and he nodded.

"I'm sorry" he said back. I fake laughed and shook my head.

"This is fucking ridiculous" I looked over at the car to see the car is on and the boys are in it. This is bullshit. "It's whatever thanks for telling me" I said and walked past him to the car.