10 things I hate about you - Hotchniss

the letter

Dear Emily,

When you're reading this, I'm probably already gone. I know that I should've told you in person, but I just couldn't do it last night. There was no way I was going to ruin your day after what you achieved yesterday. And also, I'm a coward.

Your mother talked to me while you were gone yesterday, during her party. She told me that she knew about us and that we - for sure - couldn't continue our relationship. Also, I'd lose my job here.

But most importantly, she wanted to know where you were yesterday. I didn't tell her, and I won't ever, since I can't let her ruin your dream. So please, no matter what's going to happen, don't tell her where you were. I won't even write it down here, in case she's going to read this letter one day.

I know what you're thinking - that we could still continue our relationship secretly, even though I'll work somewhere else. I thought the same at first, but it's not that easy anymore. Your mother is going to control you even stricter (if that's even possible) and she'd ruin both of us if she found out that we're still seeing each other.

Please don't get me wrong, I wish there was a different way. But this is politics. It ruins people.

Leaving you is the worst thing I have ever done and will ever do. It literally rips my heart out of my chest and the pain shooting through my body is immense. I never thought that I could even feel this way.

Being with you, even if it was only for a couple of months, was the best thing that has ever happened to me. You changed me in so many ways, and all of them were positive. You taught me how to love and how to set my priorities correctly. I have loved someone as much and the way I love you. I will always love you, no matter where my life takes me.

I'll never forgive myself for what has happened, I really thought your mother wouldn't find out. I never meant to hurt you or to leave you, only thinking about it is killing me. But this is the only way to prevent more pain and trouble in the future. I'm sorry, and I'd totally understand if you hate me now.

Please promise me that you'll always go after what you want, not your mother or anyone else, no matter what it is. You can achieve anything, you're the most powerful woman I've ever met. You deserve everything, only the best, and much more than me. You're too good for me.

Your mother wants to talk to me one last time in some minutes, which is why I have to go now. Walking through the door to your room the very last time is already too much for me. I've never felt this weak and powerless before.

Maybe, one day'll we meet again. Never forget how perfect you are, and that anyone who thinks differently is just jealous or stupid.

I love you. That's not going to change.

- Aaron

Emily and Aaron never talked again after that day, for a very long time. There wasn't a day where they didn't think about each other, wondering what the other was probably doing in that moment.

There were probably a billion times where both of them sat in front of their phones, thinking about calling the other, but then turning away again. Both of them were too scared.

After months of being a total mess, Emily graduated and started at the FBI academy in oder to become a federal agent. She even talked to her mother again, even though things were still a bit cold between them. Elizabeth had thought of different things than the FBI for her daughter, but Emily did what Aaron had told her: to pursue what she wanted.

Aaron got a new job, and soon started working at the BAU, his dream position. He met his high-school-love Haley again and they eventually started dating again. After a few years, he had become a husband and father. But even after all, he wasn't truly happy and had gone back to being a full-time-worker again, whose first priority was his work again.

Never in a million years both of them had dared to believe that they'd meet again. That was until Emily knocked on the door to the office of her new Unit Chief in Quantico, 2006.

The End.

_

Hey y'all,

please don't kill me! This is the end of "10 things I hate about you - Hotchniss". From the beginning, it was planned that this would be my first story without a happy end. I hope you forgive me. Since nearly all of my stories end happily, this one had to be different.

I hope you enjoyed reading it anyways!

New things are about to come soon, so stay tuned! :)

See you in the next story,

- jisbons