GUCCI BOY//kth

57.) can you forgive me?

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•••
"everyone keeps asking
are we okay,
the truth is we're not
but i don't know what to say"

-"all the things lost" by MS MR
•••

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Jin's POV

It had gotten fully dark outside by the time Jin started cooking dinner. Namjoon was sat in the living room, answering some emails on his laptop, his face only illuminated by the silver glow of the bright screen. Things were looking great business wise for him but that also meant he was a lot busier nowadays and had less time for Jin.

Days like this where they would sleep in, spend the whole day with each other and enjoy a homecooked dinner together had gotten pretty rare which only made Jin treasure them all the more. Usually, Jin spent his time alone at the apartment, doing work on his computer, giving online tutoring sessions and experimenting with some new recipes.

He had warmed up to the new living space rather quickly although he still missed his small but cosy apartment next to Cassia. He had a handful of friends from college he was still in touch with but he wouldn't consider any of them his close friends. He met up with people for coffee sometimes or to go to the movies but that was about it.

More and more Jin found himself spending time by himself and being alone. He enjoyed the down time and getting to experiment with new hobbies but he also really missed having close friends.

"How hungry are you, babe?" Jin called from the kitchen, preparing the tomato sauce for the lasagna he was making.

"Extremely hungry!" Joon shouted which Jin already expected since they had skipped lunch that day.

"It'll take me another hour to finish up!" Jin shouted back to which Joon replied that that was fine with him, he needed to get some more work done anyways. Jin held back from saying anything even though this was the only day of the week the two got to spend together and he'd much rather have Joon help him cook and fool around with him than silently sit in the living room with his laptop.

Jin had gotten into the habit of listening to music almost every time he was cooking nowadays. Today, it was Elvis. When he still lived next to Cassia they would cook together almost daily and without the chatter and laughs they used to share, he suddenly noticed how quiet and alone it felt to cook by himself. He tried to fill the void with music but it just wasn't the same.

More than anything he missed having her around a lot. He missed watching her hectically get ready because she was running late again or studying with her all night only to end up playing mario kart at 3 am until they fell asleep on the coach. He missed the jokes and coffee breaks, he missed barging through her door and scaring the life out of her. He missed her scolding and complaining, her morning voice and the tight hugs they shared after a long day apart. He missed Cassia. He missed his best friend.

"Jin!" Namjoon shouted and he snapped out of his thoughts.

"What?" he yelled back, pre-heating the oven.