Tiptoe

Mirthful

{ dedicated to my favorite short story author, because she can pour the entire ocean into a single glass }

Mirthful

Upon their first encounter, Anthony Stanton was dressed as a condom.

Adjacent to him, Luke Galloway was dressed as lubricant.

Grace held by far the most poise, dressed as a tampon.

“What’s that supposed to be?” Anthony had asked. He was always curious; asking things he knew the answer to just to find the appeal of another opinion, keen to the preservation of personal beliefs, never challenging viewpoints, never intruding upon perspective. And his questions were blunt and direct, but never rude. Never absurd.

So Grace had answered in the most appropriate way suited to his inquiry. Straight forward.

“A tampon.” As if it were casual conversation, Anthony nodded subtly, tilting his head in recognition.

“Oh, nice.”

“As is yours.”

Disconcerting as it could be perceived, their health class was exceedingly keen on discussing different clinical taboos; which was a very liberal step for a largely conservative, condescending school to attempt. Many students were still unsure of what an Asian was, but could list the top ten most contracted STDs of 2011.

For Halloween, their health teacher had gotten most parents and administers to sign a release form to allow them to dress to raise awareness for most social prohibitions, then argue of their importance among others (those excluded from the ‘most’ were selectively ignored) .

(Winner received a gift card to Chipotle; enough motivation to start a revolution.)

Anthony and Grace had shared the same teacher, but not until that eventful day had they actually shared a conversation. Anthony was well known around the school, bold and funny and charming but not necessarily agreeable, and she was more or less buried under her preconceived social inadaptability.

“So what does this tampon of yours do to benefit our society?” It was strange, how seriously he took it. She had never met a boy who could say ‘period’ without giggling, let alone one who could engage in an earnest discussion about a tampon. It was especially strange that he seemed to know exactly how to handle the situation without making it uncomfortable. Hardly is it common that a passionate exploration regarding the uses of feminine hygiene products is weighted of broader importance than a written essay.

“It plugs up your leak.” She said wisely, subconsciously toying with the exaggerated string dangling from the cap on her head.

“Which you would not have to do if you would use birth control.” Said Kiara, waddling up to Grace with her pill bottle costume obstructing any limb movement beyond a hop. Although Anthony seemed as comfortable in his condom costume as if it were a second skin, his hands on his hips as he contemplated them, Grace, and observably, Kiara, felt an urgent fear of toppling over. “Aside from the obvious prevention of pregnancy, birth control regulates hormones, thus preventing periods as well.” Their teacher had stopped to observe their conversation, her clipboard tucked beneath her armpit. Anthony had graciously nodded, although his face had cast into an aggrandized smile.

“Well, as per usual, pills of that sort have side effects that could be harmful to a female’s delicate and easily imbalanced body. A condom would be far more efficient for prevention of pregnancy, as would a tampon to periods.” He gestured to Grace, and she thought maybe that was the nicest thing anyone’s ever done for her. She felt the tears, and wished tampons could be inserted into the tear ducts to prevent the estrogen overload.

Luke had shoved Anthony when their teacher had cleared. Grace had forgotten about him; he seemed almost like one of Anthony’s vestigial organs.

“Douche,” he said, even though he looked at Anthony fondly. “Nobody says ‘as per usual’. You say ‘as usual’ or ‘per usual’.”

“Whatever.” Anthony said back. “It isn’t technically a grammatical sin. So the grammar Jesus is still keen on me.”

“Attention whore.”

“Well, maybe I wouldn’t have had all the attention if you gave some personal input into the debate. I mean, do you even know what you do?” Luke stopped chewing his gum momentarily, looked down at his costume. He looked confused for a moment, then scratched behind his ear.

“I don’t know. Smoother loving?”

“Shit, Luke. You’re a tit.” Anthony said, laughing. “I hope I get paired with Grace for the final instead of you.” Then he turned to her. “It is Grace, right? Or do you go by some irrelevant nickname?” If he wasn’t smiling, Grace would have thought he was mocking her.

“It’s Grace.” She confirmed. She dared to meet his eye. “And you’re Anthony?”

“Most people call me Ant. A while ago some tool was like, ‘It is relatable, as you are black, and annoying; like an ant’.” He looked at Luke when he had said that.

“You’re not actually black,” Luke had said shortly. “At darkest, you’re like #644117.”

“Just call me Ant,” he told her by the end of the period. He wrote their names across the top of their final assignment, his handwriting cursive and slightly off-kilter, the loops large and the spaces extended. “You gained the right." His eyes flicked up mischieviously. "A lot faster than Luke, too.” His friend glared at him by the mention.

“You’re a dick.” He said to Anthony from across the room, and Helen, who was sitting next to him dressed as a penis, smacked him across the face.

Ant & Grace.

He went missing the next week, but she never had the heart to erase his name from the assignment.

A/N

Wow I apologize for this prologue but seriously my health class is so boring we just stare at animated pictures of hairless males all day and point to various internal tubes and be like 'urethra' and so nobody actually knows what anything is

Omg this is literally getting rated R because all the health terms sorry wattpad. 

I'm genuinly sorry if any content offends you, and if it does you can PM me and i promise i'll edit it out 

Peace out my loves thanks so much for reading c:

-Sophie