Star-Crossed Lovers

Chapter X - Please Forget Me

"Red tulips are considered as a declaration of love."

Jeno kept on staring into Jaemin's eyes, as if he was trying to convey all his feelings to the person in front of him through those stares. Jaemin stared back with the same amount of fondness and adoration in his eyes, or maybe more. They both were so in love with each other.

Jeno reached out his hand to touch Jaemin's cheek and to his surprise, he was actually touching him. It appeared to be that Jeno's form was altered a little at that short moment and he was solidified. It was beyond any explanation but at this rate, nothing seemed reasonable anyway.

Jeno thought he was being delusional until he felt Jaemin leaned into his touch and put his own hand on top of Jeno's on his cheek. Jaemin leaned his forehead on Jeno's and they stayed in the position for some time.

Jeno's fingers trailed down to Jaemin's jawline and neck before they halted at a sudden cold sensation on his fingertips. Jeno pulled back instantly and Jaemin opened his eyes.

He saw Jeno had scooted away a little and was staring wide-eyed at his chest. Jaemin reached up his hand and his fingers felt the presence of a cold stone on his chest.

Jeno was actually staring at the necklace he was wearing. The locket, somehow, had found its way out of his shirt and exposed itself. And Jeno recognized it very well as it was his in the first place.

"Jaemin, where did you get that?"

Jeno asked with a trembling voice and pointed a finger to the locket. His eyes looked so lost and glistening with tears that threatening to fall.

"Jeno, I can explain."

Jaemin tried to take Jeno's hand into his but when their hands met, the touch had lost. He could not feel anything except for a shivering breeze that collided gently with his skin. Jeno was back in his shadow form.

At the same exact moment, Jeno felt an unbearable amount of pain on his chest at the spot where he had stabbed himself once. The pain was followed by flashes of old memories from his past playing continuously in front of his eyes.

The next thing Jaemin saw in front of him was the most heartbreaking view he could never compromised. Jeno was crouching on the floor, fist clutched against his chest like he was trying to bear the most painful wound. Tears were flowing down heavily from his tightly closed eyes and he was mumbling incoherent words repeatedly.

Jaemin's eyes were already flooded with his own tears because everything he did could not help the suffering ghost in front of him. He tried to call out Jeno's name but nothing seemed to get through to him.

When the pain had finally subsided and the memories had stopped replaying, Jeno regained back his senses. However, his eyes looked more lost and terrified than ever.

Jeno looked at Jaemin in despair, tears still streaming down his cheeks, before they disappeared into the shadows. Ghosts were not supposed to shed or even have any body fluid but then Jeno was crying his soul out.

"Jaemin, I'm so, so sorry."

Jaemin finally caught Jeno's mumbled words.

"Jeno, no. What are you saying? I'm the one at fault here. I knew your story and yet I was keeping it from you and acted like I knew nothing. I'm sorry."

Jaemin tried to touch the male in front of him. He wanted to give Jeno some sense of comfort, but everything he did was useless.

"No, Jaemin. You were never at fault. I shouldn't be using you like this. You may look exactly like her but you were never her in the first place. I was being selfish, Jaemin. I was missing her so badly, I ended up putting her image on you. But what I didn't realize until now was the fact that I'm falling deeply in love with you, Jaemin. The real you, instead of my image of her in you.

I am such a terrible person, Jaemin. I failed to protect the love of my life once but I dared to fall in love again? She even died because of me in front of my own eyes, but I couldn't even do anything to change that. I could never forgive myself, Jaemin. Even after death, she should never forgive me. I should've disappeared, Jaemin. I shouldn't have met you. I shouldn't have met her!"

Jeno was shaking uncontrollably. His voice sounded very agonizing. Jaemin would give up everything he had to the heaven in an exchange for a chance to hold the pained male in his arms at the moment.

But the Universes would never want to allow that. They just loved watching the star crossed lovers suffered.

"No, you were never a terrible person, Jeno. Stop blaming yourself. Stop putting everything before yourself. You deserves more than this. And I love you too, Jeno. I truly love you with all my heart. I don't care if you used me or whatever. I will always love you, Jeno."

For seconds, Jeno's eyes soften at Jaemin's words. He reached out his hand to hold Jaemin's. However, by the moment he realized that he was just a shadow, his expression tensed and his eyes were dead again. Jeno retracted his hand and dived metres away from Jaemin.

"If you still can't see it Jaemin, I'm a ghost! I'm not even real! I don't have a life, Jaemin. It ended ages ago. I've been stuck in this church for the past damned two hundred years for God knows why!

I can't promise you anything, Jaemin. I don't deserve your love. You don't deserve anything like me in your life. I wish I could just disappear than living in this tormenting hell. And you, Jaemin, you are an angel. You're too perfect, Jaemin. Too perfect for me. Just like her. That's why I can never have her. I can never have you."

Without a single good bye, Jeno dived away from Jaemin across the church hall, directing towards the front of the hall, trying to disappear through the wall.

But Jaemin was quick enough to yell out something that had caught the ghost's attention.

"She didn't die that day!"

Jeno halted at the newly known information. He turned to look at Jaemin and floated closer, but still three feet above him.

"What do you mean?"

Jeno asked, quizzically. Jaemin tried to clear his drying throat before answering in a husky voice.

"I meant what I said, Jeno. She didn't die that evening. She survived the poisoning. She got to live for another ten years. She got married and had a child. She was my ancestor, Jeno. Her blood runs in my veins. She was happy. You should be too."

Jeno lost in his thoughts again, like he always did. Jaemin took the silence as a sign for him to continue in comforting Jeno.

"Jeno, stop punishing yourself. You've been hurting so much. Give yourself a chance."

Jaemin's voice was gentle and his tone was half pleading. Jeno turned to face Jaemin, looking down at him from his position. Jeno's eyes were glistening, reflecting the pain he had been enduring all this time, but it seemed like he had no more tears left to cry.

"But that didn't erase the fact that she still attempted to end her life because of me, Jaemin. And even if I could do something, it was already too late. Two hundred years too late."

He floated down and stood directly in front of Jaemin. Jeno reached out his hand to touch Jaemin's cheek and smiled for the last time.

"Thank you for all the beautiful times we shared together, Jaemin. Please forget me and be happy."

Jaemin leaned in to the touch of the cold breeze and closed his eyes. He felt a shiver running down his spine and when he opened his eyes, he was alone in the empty church.

"Jeno, come back! Don't leave me like this. Jeno!"

Jaemin kept on calling the name repeatedly in between his sobs and wept. But no matter how much he called and pleaded, the ghost never came back. Jaemin fell to his knees and cried endlessly on one of the bench.

He kept on crying for God knows how long until an old man who came to clean the church approached him and asked if he was alright. Jaemin just shook his head and said nothing. He got up, grabbed his bag and ran his way home.

The sky above him was unusually dark on that particular afternoon, indicating that a terrifying thunderstorm was about to come.