Hood fever | Oscar Diaz

Chapter: 82

January 31st 2019

"There's a lot of fish in the sea, I dip my toe and then freeze, I guess that shit ain't easy."

Oscar.

I sat on the porch, I felt that shit hard in my chest.
We said goodbye.
I grabbed a 40 and just started chugging.
I knew what she'd to tonight.
I knew what I'd do tonight.
I'm letting go of you.

Leilani.

I was quiet the whole ride, I could only think of Oscar. The pain I felt in my heart was too much.
I felt Gustavo hand me a flask.
"Ready for tonight?" He asked.
I smiled and nodded. "Yeah."
As I took it and chugged it.
I'm letting go of you.

Oscar.

"You're really gonna let her go?" Tito asked.
"I thought you'd put up a fight Oscar." Benito said as he pushed me. I shook my head and kept drinking.
"Nah, it's over." I sighed.
The guys looked at each other and shook their heads.
I felt Raza's arms on me.
I turned and she kissed me, hard.
I kissed back.

The guys sighed.
"This shit is not hot." Tito said, "I'm out."
The other guys agreed and left.
Raza and I were alone now.
"Wanna go inside?" She asked smiling.
I bit my lip and kissed her again.
"Yeah baby." I whispered and she grabbed my hand and pulled me inside locking the door behind her.
I'm getting over you.

Leilani.

I was a little buzzed now.
I was sitting at the table, Gustavo went to the bathroom, aka to get more booze.
Noah came to sit next to me, then suddenly everyone piled around me.
Jasmine looked back to see if Gustavo was coming.
"What are you guys doing?" I laughed.
"Saving you!" Jamal yelled.
"Dramatic much?" I asked.
"Why are you so drunk?" Jose asked me.
I shrugged, "it's a party."
"You're getting drunk so you can stomach sleeping with Gustavo." Cesar said accusingly.
I scoffed at him. "Ridiculous.
"No it's not, it's true everyone saw how you and Oscar looked at eachother." Angel said.
I looked at him shocked he actually spoke.
"Baby, you love Oscar why are you with Stavo?" Emaza and jasmine said at the same time.
I shook my head, "Oscar left me!" I said angrily.
"I'm just trying to move on." I sighed.
"Don't do it like this." Noah said grabbing my arm.
"Baby girl Gustavo is boring as hell." Ruby said.
I scoffed, "you hated the idea of me with a cholo months ago." I said.
Ruby sighed, "things change."
"Yeah I actually want you with Oscar, that's shocking right? That should be a sign." Monse said.

"What's a sign?" Everyone moved back and Gustavo was standing behind us.
"This song!" I said jumping up. "It's a sign we should dance baby." He bit his lip and smiled at me.
I pulled him to the dance floor.
Tonight I'm getting over you.

Oscar

Raza and I were on my bed.
She tasted like cheap chapstick , not like peaches, not like Leilani..
I hated it.
I kept my eyes closed I kept the taste out of my mind I pushed myself into this.
I tried to push myself to want this.
She pulled my shirt over my head and we rolled over so I was on my back. She was kissing my neck.
It wasn't the same, all I could think about was Leilani. It hurt.
I wish that I could take away the pain.
I hope and pray that you will do the same.

Leilani.

Gustavo and I were dancing to the music.
I was buzzed and the more i moved the drunker I got. It wasn't the same.
We didn't move together like Oscar and I moved together. We weren't one.
We didn't melt and sway with the beat smoothly.
I hated it.
I didn't feel safe in his arms, his touch didn't give me chills, when I touched his hand.
There was no spark.
There was always a spark with Oscar from the beginning to the end.
I turned around and kissed Gustavo, I was throwing myself into this. He didn't smell like beer.
He smelled like hard liquor and it didn't go good on him like it did Oscar. He didn't wear the smell of alcohol like the cholo I fell inlove with.
All I could think about was Oscar.
This hurts me.
It hurts.
I wish that I could take away the pain.
I hope and pray that you will do the same.