18 June [continued]
I wouldn't pray for this pain to leave, because my heart knows, deep down, that I relish it. I wouldn't, in a million years, wish for it, but right now, I wouldn't wish for it to leave either. I need this. I need to remember how it feels like to have a part of me ripped into pieces to fuel the mind.
You didn't take my heart, you never had it to begin with. You had my trust though, not many people do. You had it for the taking, so you took it, and crushed it beneath your feet. Every single part of me that I put on display for you to see, every ugly thing in my head, all that you saw, you didn't even deserve to catch a glimpse of. I wish I had guarded my thoughts with greater ferocity, because my thoughts are chaotic but beautiful, and someone like you is not entitled to witness such beauty. You have no idea the grotesque thoughts which run through my mind and maybe you have never felt pain the way I have. And maybe that will always make it easier for me to be kind than it will be for you, because I will always be able to sympathize with those with flames in their minds. Because I burn too. Every minute, of every waking day, I am engulfed by the searing heat of intensity. That pain will always be my motivating factor to look out for others who are hurting too.
YOU ARE READING
Heartbreak Hotel
RomanceAn ode to my love for you, as a form of validation of everything between us, no matter how brief a time our paths have crossed. ~Till we meet again, my love. {Nothing here is pretty, nothing here is structured. Some are pieces of poetry, others del...
