This chapter is dedicated to @ChloeHolderfield who helped me to update faster. I TRIED TO UPDATE SOON SO YOU WOULDN'T DIE CHLOE! I hope you didn't die...
Anyway on with the chapter!
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Liam's POV
It's three in the freaking morning and I can't sleep. I mean I have to kiss this girl and Harry's pretty serious about her. He's so protective and I can tell that he loves her. He's never like that with any girl and now that he's found one that he likes Destiny just has to come and mess it all up. She always does that. She messes everything up. I just don't know if I can handle it anymore! Things are getting way out of control and I'm not exactly sure how to fix it. Grr... This sucks big time.
I looked over to the clock. 3:57. It's almost four in morning and I haven't slept at all. I'm going to be feeling it in the morning. I still didn't feel tired or willing to sleep. As soon as I fell asleep the faster I would have to........ I can't even say it.
Since I'm not going to sleep any time soon I decided to listen to some music. I plugged in my headphones and pressed shuffle. You Found Me by The Fray started playing.
'I found God on the corner of 1st and Amistad
Where the West was all but won
All alone, smoking his last cigarette
I said, "Where've you been?" He said, "Ask anything."
Where were you, when everything was falling apart.
All my days were spent by the telephone that never rang
And all I needed was a call that never came
To the corner of 1st and Amistad'
The Fray's music always calms me down. It's just so calming and peaceful feeling I guess. I don't really know how to explain it. It's like even if the song has nothing to do with my situation it still feels like it relates.
'Lost and insecure, you found me, you found me
Lying on the floor, surrounded, surrounded
Why'd you have to wait? Where were you? Where were you?
Just a little late, you found me, you found me.
But in the end everyone ends up alone
Losing her, the only one who's ever known
Who I am, who I'm not and who I wanna to be
No way to know how long she will be next to me
It's weird the song talking about losing that one special girl in their life. Where as I can't wait to get rid of mine. She's definately the only one who's ever known who I am and she just can't wait to tell the whole world and ruin my life.
'Lost and insecure, you found me, you found me
Lying on the floor, surrounded, surrounded
Why'd you have to wait? Where were you? Where were you?
Just a little late, you found me, you found me.
The early morning, the city breaks
And I've been calling for years and years and years
And you never left me no messages
You never sent me no letters
You got some kind of nerve taking all I want
Lost and insecure, you found me, you found me
Lying on the floor, Where were you? Where were you?
Lost and insecure, you found me, you found me
Lying on the floor, surrounded, surrounded
Why'd you have to wait? Where were you? Where were you?
Just a little late, you found me, you found me.
Why'd you have to wait, to find me, to find me?'
As the song ended I let out a sigh. Things were not going as I planned. I had been put in a band with four other people who quickly became my best friends, my brothers. I could tell them anything. Then we became number one and everything was perfect. Everthing was beyond perfect and I was so happy. That was all part of the plan. Then Destiny came in and took my happiness and smashed it into the dirt. I can get it back but it's going to take a lot of digging, because she smashed it pretty far down. The only problem is I don't have the courage to tell her to leave me alone. I was scared because everyone would know that I killed someone. They would know that I killed my mother, my own mother. They would hate me and we would lose fans then the lads would hate me. I don't think that I would be able to handle it if they hated me. I already feel like I'm alone, but I don't need them to hate me and then actually be alone. I feel like I need to tell them. Like they need to know. There's a little voice inside my head that says do it, but another voice that says to keep it a secret. It's like the devil and angel that are on your shoulders in cartoons except I don't know which voice is right and which is wrong. It's all to frustrating.
I knew that I needed to sleep so I took my headphones out and let sleep over take me.
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I sooo didn't feel like writing today but I needed to update so I told myself to sit and write and I did. YAY! I taake forever to write chapters. Bleh. Oh well.
This is short and kind of a filler. I know it sucks right now! It will get better I promise! And I hope this makes sense cause sometimes when I write nothing makes sense.
I love you all<3
McKenna x
YOU ARE READING
Don't tell me what to do -A Liam Payne Fanfic-
FanfictionLiam Payne is in the worlds biggest boy band, he has an amazing career, four best friends, and a girlfriend. Life should be good right? Think again. Liam doesn't love his girlfriend and she doesn't love him but she makes him date her and do many oth...