/Rotc crap
Lots of shit in rotc. Usually surrounds seniors. They played a prank last year where they would tell freshmen who didn't have their cover (flight cap) to put their hands on their heads as replacements.
For as long as time, there was always a rule about not putting shit in your pockets. This rule was neither followed not enforced. This said, whenever anyone left their formal uniform pants in the armory, drill kids would sew the pockets shut because they'd be bored. And no on could talk shit.
The DI grilling some kid who didn't shave: "What in the fresh hell did you shave with? A rock and whip cream?"
/Smoked
Saw some kid fill up a 55 gallon can with cigarette butts.
/In the shadows
Had to stand watch over an abandoned building to make sure ninjas didn't take over it because I messed up... lol
/Smart thinking
Saw a first sergeant make a pvt pick up his vomit and put it in his pocket to save for later
/Brotherly love
Me and a buddy were clowning around. Made us do push ups face to face. Every time we came up we both have to say 'I love you' in unison. We did it until the DS got tired which seemed like it went on forever.
/Shit
Someone left a turd in the port a jon about the size and thickness of a 40oz beer can. The drills were trying to find the guy bc they were worried about his health, and wondered if he needed stitches
/Grab your shit
Currently a DS at FLW. Had a private my first cycle shit blood like week 6 or 7. Battle (battle buddy) of mine told him "alright pri that's not good grab your shit we're going to the hospital" ...Pri literally came downstairs with a bag of his blood shit... literally grabbed his shit... that set the tone for my DS time lol
/Committed
During our final FTX I was pulling guard and caught this chick blowing one of my buddies in a foxhole. "Bro wtf are you doing?" "Uh nothing" "BS nothing! Dont get caught!" The chick didn't even break stride, she was committed!
/Best worst enemy
Cool nco: "Fuck this shit, go hide in the barracks room until 1700, unless I call you"
YOU ARE READING
Mildly entertaining military stories.
HumorA collection of short yet wild military stories. None of these are mine. These stories, most of them supposedly humorous, are supposed to give light to what it's like to be a service member, and, hopefully, prevent you from joining as any vet worth...
