Not Just A Game

Chapter 34

"Today is a big, big day!" Elsie squeals from the Kitchen. I hear the clicking of her high heels and the scrape of metal forks on ceramic plates, indicating breakfast has already started.

Groggily rolling over from my sprawled-out position on my mattress, I flutter my eyes open and rub the sleep out of them.

My eyelids droop with morning sleepiness, but I hop in the shower in hopes of waking up a bit more.

The warm water is refreshing on my skin, coming down in a rain of scented liquids that foam and wash my body. I've tried nearly every shower adjustment and soap scent you can use in the last few weeks in the Capitol. Back home we only had one setting- cold.

Stepping out of the humid shower, being careful not to slip on the wet tile, I pull on some comfortable clothes and comb through my damp blonde hair.

I look at my pale reflection in the mirror, and realize I haven't been exposed to sun in almost a month. Even the arena isn't real sun.

I grab my toothbrush and squeeze the tube of minty toothpaste onto the bristles.

I wet the bristles to soften them up, then scrub away at my teeth as white as pearls because of the advanced toothpaste they use here.

I spit and then rinse my mouth out with a small, clear cup placed beside the sink.

Once I'm back in my bedroom, I don't bother with shoes. I just drape my hair over one shoulder and head out the door, down the hallway and into the kitchen.

I realize I'm not the last one to the table, as Griffin isn't sitting down munching on his waffles as usual.

I try not to question it, and grab a plate, piling on every food imaginable. I've noticed how I've really taken advantage of their food here in the Capitol. It's hard to do, actually, when you know that everyone back home is starving, hoping for even a single roll of bread to put their hunger on a temporary break. I wish I could send some to them, but I know that I can't.

I take a seat next to Harley, and across from Dustin, and dig in to the mountain of food in front of me.

It tastes like a bite out of the gates of heaven itself, to say the least. I don't know how the citizens in the Capitol could ever get tired of this food.

Elsie babbles on behind me about the importance of being prompt and on time for any event, scolding me "nicely" for arriving to breakfast late. Honestly, the shrill voice behind me is just background music as I try to focus on the prime objective for

today- interviews.

They'll be drowning me in questions about the games, and the people I killed. I don't think I'm ready to face those memories yet. I did what I had to do to stay alive. Talking about murdering innocent people will just reopen the jar of guilt that I've been storing away since I arrived back in the Capitol.

I feel that even if I do speak to Caesar about the games at the interviews, and my feelings about it, it wouldn't be my true words. I could never talk to him about it truthfully. That would require bringing up the District's mutual hate for the Capitol, and if they saw that I felt guilt or regret, they'd see that as a cue to torture me even more in the arena.

That's something I've learned from watching the games all of my life-

The good people never win.

The Gamemakers always put some cruel twist in the end to 'spice it up' and make it more 'interesting' as the vicious careers pound the living daylights out of the other tributes. It's sick, really. It's almost as if they just want the careers to win because that's what everyone expects, not because of their actual capabilities.