The Replacement Luna (A Luna Chronicles Novel) [Completed]

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Eleven

Ruth Eden Glass

My hands shook as I tried not to freak myself out. I knew it was going to be hard having a baby with an Alpha, but I kept forgetting that that Alpha was Quinn. Quinn was not like any Alpha I had met before – granted I hadn't experienced lots of them. But, his thoughtfulness and kindness made it harder and harder to resist him.

And as much as I liked Quinn, I couldn't be with him. Part of it was that I was scared to get hurt again, but the larger part of it was that I didn't want to hurt Quinn. Because I did like Quinn, but that was all it was – like. I'd experienced love, I'd experienced having a soul mate and he hadn't. I would never be able to fill that void that his mate left, and it wasn't fair of me to try.

As much as he was over the death of his mate, it would still affect any sort of relationship with him. Because he was still looking for that once in a life time, tingles in your stomach, type of love. Because he'd not ever had that. And, as much I may wish it was different, I'd already had that. And as good as he was, and as much as I liked him, he wouldn't compare to Drew.

It was cruel actually, how Drew could hurt me so much, yet I knew that I would still choose him over any other man. He was toxic and addictive, and I was an addict who couldn't get enough. It took the death of our son for me to realise how deep I hadn't gotten, and I left. But, as much as I didn't want to, I wasn't sure that I'd never go back.

If someone asked me tomorrow, if I would go back to Drew my answer would be; 'no, hell no. Absolutely no way in fucking hell'. Yet, there was still a part of me – that Werewolf soul of mine – that would always reply with 'but what if?'.

And it was that little 'but what if' that stopped me pursuing a relationship with Quinn, or any man in the future. Because it wouldn't be fair to let Quinn fall in love with me, think I was his future, while I kept thinking 'but what if' in the back of my mind. Drew was always going to be there, and it wasn't fair – not when I could potentially get in the way of Quinn meeting someone he could actually have a future with.

But, as set as I was on my decision, Quinn didn't make it easy.

"Stupid Alpha" I muttered to myself, under my breath – but I wasn't truly annoyed, just exasperated. While I had been out running my rounds, Quinn had dropped off a present at my house. A kind, thoughtful, sweet present. "Damn him to hell" I grumbled.

The box was large and white, with a soft purple ribbon wrapped around it. Inside was a selection of small gifts that made up the one large gift. It was like a 'thanks for forgetting to take your birth control pills' hamper. I looked through the presents with weird butterfly feeling in my stomach.

Inside the box was; two boxes of chocolate, a bottle of alcohol-free champagne, a scrap book for pregnant woman, two catalogues of baby items, a selection of gift cards to baby shops, a selection of maternity clothing and a book of baby names.

All the gifts were thoughtful and sweet, that was why I was so annoyed. It was hard enough to resist someone who openly told you he wanted to be with you, but it was even harder when that person was completely understanding and was thoughtful enough to buy me a hamper of gifts.

I didn't see Quinn until the next morning, he rang me twice but I slept in late and missed them. I sent him a text when I woke up and by the time I'd showered and changed, he was knocking on my door. "Morning" he grinned, as I let him in – my hair still wrapped up in a towel on the top of my head. He knelt down and kissed my stomach, completely taking me off guard, "and morning to you, little one".

"I was going to come see you later" I commented, shutting the front door behind him.

"I was up anyway" Quinn shrugged, pushing his dark hair back. He was wearing his workout clothes, so I assumed he had been for his normal morning run around the territory borders. A slight glisten of sweat was on his golden skin, but apart from that he didn't look like he'd just run the equivalent of a half marathon.