The Replacement Luna (A Luna Chronicles Novel) [Completed]

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen

Ruth Eden Glass

I had a nightmare as I slept. I dreamt I was standing at the top of a grand staircase, three babies in my arms; two girls and one boy. Abel, my beautiful boy, in the middle and my two daughters on either side of him.

A voice called my name, I looked up to see Drew walking up the stairs towards me. And then Abel was falling out my arms, tumbling down the stairs. I screamed – trying to catch him but dropping my daughters at the same time. All three babies are falling in slow motion. I pause, trying to work out who to save; Abel or my daughters.

I awake before the decision is made.

I was screaming and crying as I thrashed in the bed. Warm hands grabbed me, before Quinn pressed me into him – my head going into his neck as I cried. He ran his hand up and down my back, whispering sweet nothings to me, as I sobbed like a baby. By the time I had calmed down, there was a large wet patch on his shirt. He sat on the edge of my bed, looking beautiful but stressed.

"Sorry" I whispered, snorting as I wiped my nose.

"Nothing to be sorry for, darlin". He pressed a sweet kiss to my forehead as I tried to get a grip on myself.

"Bad dream" I muttered, trying to explain my embarrassing behaviour.

"Drew?"

"Sort of. But Abel and the girls were there and I...I guess I'm just terrified of losing the girls like I did with Abel".

"That's not going to happen, Ruth, I promise". He kissed me sweetly as I tried not to think about Drew. I opened my mouth to ask him how it had gone with my ex-husband, but shut my mouth again. If I didn't know about it, I was going to obsess about it, but if I did know it might hurt me even more. It was a damn paradox.

"So I was thinking that I'd like them both to have similar names" Quinn blurted out. I looked at him in confusion. "Our girls. I think it's cute when twins have similar names or start with the same letter. Like, Victoria and Veronica or Hannah and Hayley".

"How about Lily and Rose? Both flower names" I replied – knowing he was trying to distract me and I was letting him.

"Hmm I'm not a massive fan of Lily, but Rose is nice" he agreed. And, so, for a few minutes we chatted aimlessly about baby names; despite the fact we'd already decided on names months before. But, that was why I knew that Quinn was the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Because, he knew exactly when I needed distracting and he knew exactly how to do it.

I reached up and cupped his cheek, shutting up his conversation. "I'm not going back to him, Quinn. Truthfully, I may have considered it a few months ago if I wasn't pregnant. Because the only one who'd be hurt was me. But, now, it wouldn't just be me. It would be you and the girls".

"And yourself, Ruth" Quinn frowned at me, looking a little annoyed at me. Quinn and I had never had an argument; I had no doubt that even if he just raised his voice to me I'd cry because I was such a basketcase. "Fuck that bastard, Ruth".

"Quinn" I groaned, not wanting to argue. But Quinn had anger in his eyes.

"No, Ruth, I'm not going to just ignore this. Forget me, forget the girls and forget Abel for the moment. You need to start being a little more selfish. Going back to Drew will only land you in another cycle of abuse. An abuser never changes their ways. It's a cycle of abuse, manipulation and false promises and abuse again. And you don't deserve that. You've broken the cycle already, because you deserve better".

I didn't cry. I was out of tears – for once in my damn life! Instead, I just looked down at my hands as I played with the edge of the comforter. "I know you're right. But it's hard" I admitted, voice small.