Ultraviolence

Chapter Three

I looked at the clock. 6:37 pm. I had no idea what I was going go wear or where we were even going. I didn't even know his last name.

I walked across my cold bedroom floor to my closet. Within five minutes, I picked out a black blouse, maroon colored jeans, and my black flats. I pondered wearing heels, but Harry was only a few inches taller than me, so there was no need.

6:43. I undressed and stepped into the shower, the hot water softly and sweetly burning my skin as it ran down my back. I've always liked showers. They calmed me and rid away the bad memories that constantly seeped through my mind. It was a place where I could think without thinking of the past or the future. A place where I could think of the present.

I stepped out of the shower and quickly blow-dried and straightened my hair. I put on my silk bath robe and walked out the bathroom door into my bedroom. 7:13 pm.

I sat on my bed attempting to relax for the first time in so long. I haven't been on a date in a while. Not since before the whole world came crashing down on top of me, shattering my fragile heart and mind. Sometimes, I blame him for that. Then I realize that, yes, he hurt me, but it was I who chose to stay for so long. And when I finally walked out the door, it was I who fell into that darkness. I wasn't pushed, I jumped. He hurt me but not with enough force to push me into that state of mind. It was all me...

I worked on homework for about 15 minutes. I looked at the clock. 7:37 pm. I untied my bath robe and put on my evening outfit.

I walked into the living room and sat on the couch. My parents weren't home and my sister, Allison, was away at college. My parents were lawyers. They were always so "busy" with their work that I never knew what time they would be home.

8:02 pm. There was a knock on my front door. I walked from the couch and opened it. It was Harry.

"Hi" He smiled.

"Let's go." I said, reluctantly walking out the door with Harry.

"You look beautiful tonight." He blushed.

"Yeah, okay." I replied.

He led me to his car, which was parked on the opposite side of my street. He opened the passenger door and helped me inside. It was such a nice car. Rich looking. All black, leather interior. My train of thought crashed as the car door opposite mine shut.

"Why are you always like that? So bitter and...locked up. I'm sorry that I would like to get to know you better. I'm sorry that I think you're pretty. If you don't want to be here, you might as well just get out now before I fall.." Harry said, all in one breath.

"You're right and I'm sorry. I want to be here, really." I really did feel bad for the way I was acting. I'm just scared to fall in love again..scared to shatter again.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"The Kettle." Harry replied. He still seemed shaken up by the way I was acting.

"What's that?" I asked.

"Sorry but I'm still kind of new here." I added.

"Oh yeah. Sorry. It's just a coffee shop. Kind of like an upgraded Starbucks with food. Is that good enough?" Harry asked sarcastically.

"Yeah..I really am sorry.." I sput out.

"It's fine." Harry said, still hurt, but not as much.

We arrived at "The Kettle" and Harry opened my door and led me inside. We ordered our drinks and sat down on a couch towards the back of the room.

"Spencer?" He asked.

"Yeah"

"Your real name, Elizabeth, why don't you go by that?" He questioned, his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes gleaming.

"I don't like it" I told him.

"Oh. I do." He mumbled, barely loud enough for me to hear.

"By the way.." I mentioned.

"What?"

"What's your last name?" I asked him.

He really was beautiful. Of course, he had looks to kill. Curly hair, emerald eyes, prominant jawline. But when he spoke, it just added to everything about him. It made him even more handsome than he already was. He knew it, that he was attractive. He flaunted his confidence in a way I have never witnessed before. I bet he had every single girl in this school all over him. With that thought in my head, the saddest fear crept into my mind. If he had every girl wrapped around his finger, at his beck and call..why would he choose me? With that though I became skeptical. Of everything he said and everything he did. But, once again, my train of thought crashed as he spoke.

"Styles. Harry Styles." He said, locking his emerald eyes with mine. It was as if he knew what I was thinking and knew just when to speak, so maybe, just maybe he could get me to fall for him. Only this time, I wasn't going to jump.