i can't stay mad at you

fourteen

Miles

When I walked into school, the plan was not to speak to Olivia. I thought it would be easier to get rid of this small little crush if I just avoid communication completely. Ethan had other plans. 

"I know exactly what you're thinking, and it's not happening." He speaks as we walk down the hall. I see Olivia at her locker, and immediately try to change directions.

"Nope," Ethan says as he grabs the sleeve of my hoodie, keeping me next to him. It's too late to walk away now, she's already spotted us. I have no choice but to look as miserable as possible so she doesn't try to speak to me.

When she says hi, I nod in her direction and pull out my phone. I try not to acknowledge the fact that she's wearing a t-shirt dress looking thing that really compliments her figure. Or the fact that her hair is out today and I can smell the amazing scent from where I'm standing. 

I look in my phone, pretending like I'm not listening to what she's saying. Why do I feel calmer just in her presence?

When she mentions her weird family problems, I almost scoff. You don't know family problems until you're in my family. When the bell rings, I speed of to my class, without turning back. That went pretty well. Now, if I could just go the rest of the day without talking to her, that would be great.

After Ethan continued bothering me about Olivia after we left the diner, I gave up and told him I would try and ask her out. But, of course I was lying out of my ass, because there is no way that will be happening. I don't even want a girlfriend. Why would a I want a chick constantly bugging me and around me 24/7 when Ethan plays that roll just fine. This is just a little crush that will probably be gone by tomorrow. 

The last thing I need is another Kelsi situation. My freshman year, I began dating Kelsi Lytterman, and haven't dated a girl since. I became comepletely invested in this girl till I soon found out had a completely different boyfriend that she was investing her time into. That was not only the first time I had got suspended in school for fighting, but also a pivotal climax in my depression and anger issues. 

I was almost forced to leave schools from how badly I beat that guy up, but at the time it was worth it. Now, I regret throwing a punch for that girl. From then on, I was no longer allowed to have a class with Kelsi or the dumb asshole Drew, she was cheating with. But for some godforsaken reason, the school thought it was okay that my senior year to put me and Kelsi in the same class, as well as Olivia. Kelsi sits in the back, and I rarely even make eye contact with her, but just knowing her presence is around makes me uneasy. I truly do hate her. 

By the time, I get to third period with Olivia, I have managed to stay pretty silent all day and not cause any problems. Sitting next to her for a whole period may change that.

"Hey Miles," She smiles at me. How can she still manage to be nice to me after all the shitty things I have said to her? How can I ignore her if she's being so chill. 

I stare at her for a quiet second before finally replying, "Hi."

"Your hair looks nice today." She comments. Yeah, that's because for some reason I've been trying in the morning.

"Thanks, yours does too." This is the most awkward moment in my life. I can't remember the last time I complimented someone, let alone a girl. What is happening to me?

"Thank you." Not once does she turn away, "I'm glad that you and Ethan talked."

"Yeah I guess so." I roll my eyes. Why does she always want to talk about Ethan. Is she into him?

"I'm just happy that he's happy, he was so scared to tell you-"

At this point, I'm blocking her out. If she knows that Eth is gay, why does she seem into him. Or maybe I'm crazy. But what else am I supposed to think when he is all she ever talks about.