"This is everything I've been feeling, everything I've been going through that I had to deal with ALONE, at the end of the day you left me when I needed you the most, I needed you with everything that was going on with me but no you were too busy caught up in your own fucking lala land to even understand now you want everyone to feel bad for you cause she's been stringing you along and you didn't know, BIG WHOOP even tho I told you from the start, that the bitch was sneaky and you didn't take a real blood test but no don't listen to the girl who didn't even know she wasn't pregnant anymore right?, you've hurt me in more ways than you can imagine and you think it's all going to be rainbows and butterflies, HELL TO THE FUCK NO! IM SO FUCKING DONE WITH YOU. You know what i've been through,you know I haven't had no father figure my whole life, no man figure, I haven't had anything. My real dad, gone, I didn't even get to cherish the moments I had with him. Now you see why I'm so skeptical about men? Then you really not helping. My step-dad kicked me out when I was pregnant, didn't give a fuck either and I had to struggle with my first born child HOMELESS. My first boyfriend the father of my child, raped me and got me pregnant and left, now I have to add you into that category, at the end of the day WHAT IN THE ACTUAL HELL makes you think I give a fuck about you leaving cause I can bet your ass A MILLION FUCKING DOLLARS, THAT I'LL NEVER LOVE A MAN LIKE I LOVED MY FATHER and I put that shit on Ashlynn. I don't give a simple fuck about your stupid ass leaving, but hey that's my choice right, I sure know how to pick em right? You know what fuck you, I'M DONE WITH THIS SHIT, I'M DONE-........... i'm done Mailk, i'm done"
"Baby liste-
"You lost the right to call me that when you left don't you fucking forget that shit" I said getting up.
"Please don't leave me" he said coming toward me.
"I will always have love for you Malik but this-..... I need time" i said walking downstairs and leaving the house getting in my car.
I just started crying and hard I don't know where I was going but I didn't stop.
I ended up at my dad's grave.
Even tho he's gone, I feel like I can connect to him more than anybody.
"Uhhhhhhhh dad, I don't know what to do, i'm losing everybody, right under my fingers like it was with you, i just wish you were here, so I wouldn't feel so alone, everything is all my fault, your death, my fault, my baby, my fault, Malik, my fault, everything is just my fault....everything..............I....just....need....help.......i.....need......you, dad please."
As I said that my heart started beating slow but hurting.
My heart started clutch very hard and I started to having trouble breathing.
*deep breath*
5..4..3..2.1
*deep breath*
"Jada, so what you avoiding me now?" I hear a familiar voice calling me.
"What the fuck do you want Malik, why would you follow me?" I said turning around.
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