Falling for the second time

Part 11

Natasha's pov.

Loneliness..the well known loneliness. I lost count with the days, but I have noticed something. Rose... she just makes me feel happier than ever so I barely think about Steve. On the other hand her eyes, or I should say his eyes...they are the same. I can't run away from my love towards him. I can't stop thinking about him. Although I wanted to get my baby and find him tell him that I love him and he should be with me and his daughter. I didn't go for it. Maybe this is the thousandth time that these thoughts are crossing my mind, but than Rose starts crying or it's time for her food so I just repeat that routine every day and it feels like living the same day all over again.

Here am I now desperate, cooking dinner in the garden.

"Hey."

Voice echoed from behind me. That familiar sound of his steps approaching me. My body shivered, I lost my breath for few moments. I colsed my eyes and touched my forehead, pretending that he isn't there. I hoped he was, but I didn't have the courage to turn.

"Natasha" He said relaxed. Now I was sure.

I turned swiftly and gasped. I started biting my lips from nervousness. "Ohh I missed him so much" I thought.

N: Steve...I.. uhh.. Please don't leave again.
Unexpected tears formed in my eyes.

He nodded and smiled slightly with the corner of his lips.

S: You know... um, I was really worried about you when that building exploded, in Vienna.
He came one step closer.

N: I know. I looked up to find him looking at me.

S: Natasha I'm sorry for what I said. I didn't mean it.

He said it and I knew he ment it. Suddenly that was all i needed to hear to cheer up.

N: I know, don't worry. You must know that by not telling you I didn't mean any harm to you.
I stepped forward a bit.

S: I know. And at the airport when you let us escape...thank you.

N: You would do it for me.

S: In a heartbeat.

We starred at each others eyes, untill it become weird.

N: Please sit.

He nodded and I pulled two chairs and we sat down.

N: So how much do you remember? After the chitauri battle.

S: How we fought Rumlow, Wanda did a mistake trying to save me...than the accords. We fought at that airport when you let us leave. But later that day I fought with Tony again beacuse he find out Bucky killed his parents. Everything that you told me, exactly the way you said it.

N: What is the last thing you recall?

S: I had a huge fight with Tony. Than I flew off to Wakanda with Bucky. That's all...The last thing I remember is ariving in Wakanda with Bucky.

As he spoke my body tensed up more and more. How should I react if he mentions something about us...but he didn't.

N: And the first thing?

S: Umm... You and Bruce kissed in Clint's house, the night before we left. I couldn't sleep and I went out where I saw you two...

"Oh my god why does he remember that and not us." I thought. I didn't know how to react.

N: Yeah. That was just... I was confused that time, me and Bruce...

S: It's all fine. You're not obligated to explain yourself.

He was comforting me, but with certain sadness on his face.

N: No it's fine Steve...

S: But that isn't all..? Those aren't all of my memories, are they?

N: Not really, those are your memories from the last two years except for... the time we spent on the run..before they brainwashed you. But that's normal, since that was right before they brainwashed you.

S: Yeah..I still miss a few years between the chitauri battle and the accords, and the time we were in London. Well nothing big happened then, right?

N: Yeah, I've told you. You came, saved me, than we were on the run together and that's it.

S: I know, I know.

N: You got some of your memories back you should be very happy.

S: Natasha is Bruce Rose's father?

He looked at me hopelessly.

N: What? No... I haven't seen him since he left.

S: But you still love him? Beacuse you... made the baby at the time when I was in coma...I thought a little about that.

N: No, no, that thing is over.

I was getting angry pnly beacuse I couldn't prove what I was saying. And he noticed.

S: I'm sorry, I stepped over the line. That's your private life. I'll go to the beach.

N: No, no please stay. The dinner is almost ready. Besides, you know that I forget about him the day he left.

S: Still, that's none of my business.

N: It's okay.

S: So am I wellcome home.

N: Always.

Steve helped with serving the dinner and all of them had a perfect family dinner except that they weren't a family.

Weeks passed and day by day their lives changed a little bit more. Natasha was enjoying the motherhood. And Rose.. she just filled them with happiness. Steve's life was perfect the way it was. Rose was healthy, good, adorable baby. She was incredibly quiet during the night. And above all she accepted Steve, she never cried when he held her. Steve and Natasha never spoke about who's Rose's father again and they didn't need to. Steve was doing his job perfectly without knowing.