Me, Myself, and Him

Chapter 26: It could've been great

Lapis POV

"H-How? Peridot gave me the cure! You should be gone!" I yelled, still too weak to move.

Are you really that fucking stupid? THERE. IS. NO. CURE!!! Yeah, whatever that liquid was may have extremely weakened my strength, but nothing can get rid of me. We're in this for the long run. Now, let me back into the driver's seat. I've got a gremlin I need to shatter and a plan I need to carry out.

"N-NO!!! The deal was that I'd help you if you wouldn't hurt Peridot or the Crystal Gems. And look what you did! I don't even know what happened to her hand, but whatever it is, you did that. I'm not helping you or letting you control me EVER AGAIN!!!" I shouted.

We'll see about that. Time to do what I should've done instead of trying to reason with you.

Gray ran over to me and shoved me violently. I braced myself to be ejected from my body, but... it didn't happen. I simply fell onto my back.

What the hell?

He tried kicking me out of my body, but all it did was shove me into the ground.

WHY THE HELL ISN'T IT WORKING?!?

The cure worked. Well, sort of.

He wasn't strong enough to take control over me. And I was gaining strength.

I slowly rose to my feet, chuckling at Gray.

"Maybe that cure didn't work, but it did do something. You're not the one in control any more GRAY. I am. And I'm not letting anyone else her hurt." I said triumphantly.

I turned towards Peridot, who was still both unconscious and trapped under the rubble. My heart dropped upon seeing what was left of her hand, but I shook the feeling away. Apologies aren't important right now. Getting Peridot out of here was.

But are apologies really going to fix this? Can I ever make up for this? Of course not...

No... Nononono! Why are those thoughts still here? The cure should've gotten rid of them too!

Because we're your true emotions, Lapis. Face it, you've always been a monster. And all of your actions: you killed Steven, brutally kicked Peridot's ass, and you almost destroyed Beach City! Who in their right mind would EVER forgive you?

I clutched my head tightly and shut my eye, trying desperately to stop the thoughts. "Shut up. You're... Y-You're wrong!"

Admit it, Lapis. You know we're right. This isn't the first offence. Stealing the ocean? MALACHITE?!? DO YOU THINK THEY EVRR FORGIVE YOU FOR THAT?!? HAVE YOU FORGIVEN YOURSELF FOR THAT?!?

"...No. I haven't."

If you know you're a monster, why fight it? Might as well play the part.

I had just noticed I was walking away from Peridot without even realizing it. Towards that strange glowing knife Gray had used.

"W-Wait..."

First things first, the little GREMLIN needs to pay for interrupting us.

I bent down to pick up the knife, clutchcing it tightly in my hand.

"Wait, I'm not doing this! W-What's happening to me?"

Take that knife, and plunge it deep inside Peridot's Gem. Shatter her.

I turned around to face Peridot, only to come face to face with Gray. He was smirking, and his entire demeanor yelled "Calm and Collected."

My entire body was shaking at this point, and tears were starting to form in my eyes. I couldn't stop myself from moving.