Carry You Home

Nine

Stevie couldn't sleep. No matter how good Lindsey's arms felt around her as he held her from behind after they had just shared the most beautiful encounter together in a very long time, and no matter how much her heart ached to just fall asleep in his warm embrace and not worry about a thing for a couple of hours, she knew she wasn't ready for the heavy conversation that awaited them in the morning.

She also knew, that no matter how beautiful tonight had been and how many buried feelings it had brought back to the surface, it didn't change one single problem they had. Their issues were all still the same. He was still engaged to someone else, a woman he professed not to love but who was obviously easier to be with. Also, he still had anger and jealousy issues that Stevie's newfound success with her solo career only made worse.

She, on the other hand, wasn't the naive, carefree young girl Lindsey had fallen in love with all these years ago, anymore, either. Robin's death had left her with the duty to care for a little boy and her liking to cocaine had grown into a full-on addiction she wasn't ready to confess, yet. Not even to herself.

She turned in his arms and took one last look at him, trying to engrave this very moment into her soul forever. She knew what she had to do.

With tears in her eyes, she ran her fingers through his hair once more, bent down and placed a lingering kiss on his lips.

“I'm so sorry.“, she whispered, her eyes closed as she inhaled his scent, “I hope you can forgive me one day.“

Careful not to wake him, she freed herself quietly out of his embrace and stood up to search for her clothes that were scattered all over the floor. Quickly, she got dressed, then reached for her packed bag from before and ran downstairs to call a car.

“Stevie? Is that you?“, Kim's voice echoed throughout the hallways as soon as she had closed the front door behind herself about an hour later.

“Yeah, it's me.“, she said, placed down her bag and made her way upstairs into the nursery.

“I'm so glad you're back.“, Kim muttered, he had Matthew in his arms, the little boy was crying, “I don't know what's wrong with him. He just won't stop crying.“

It was quite obvious that Kim was completely unable to cope with the situation at hand.

“Give him to me.“, Stevie said and took the baby from his arms, “Go and lay down for a while, Kim. You need some sleep.“

“But aren't you tired and exhausted yourself?“

“I'm fine.“, she said and offered him the best smile she could muster, “We're just gonna sit down here and Aunt Stevie will sing you your favorite song. Huh, baby boy, does that sound good?“, she cooed at the infant in her arms that instantly started to calm down some, hearing Stevie's voice.

“You're amazing with him.“, Kim said, impressed with Stevie's ability to soothe his son, “It almost seems like as if he just missed you and that's why he was crying.“

Stevie smiled down at the little boy, caressing his chubby cheeks with one finger while he looked up at her with his beautiful big blue eyes, only small whimpers escaping his lips by now, “I think we should get married, Kim.“

“Wh-what?!“, Kim looked at her with wide eyes, asking himself whether he had heard that right.

“It's the right thing to do.“, Stevie explained matter-of-factly, “We need to stick together, now. Matthew needs us.“

“But why do we need to get married for that?“

“I think it's what Robin wanted.“, Stevie said and looked up at Kim for the first time, “I haven't told you that before but the night she died, she wanted to talk to me.“

“I know. I remember that night. I was there, too.“

“Yes, but you were with Matthew when she and I talked.“, she said and brought the baby to her chest to cuddle him closer, “Robin wanted me to look after the both of you, Kim. She was worried about you. She wanted to make sure someone cared for you two. You were right the other day, I am the only mother Matthew knows. I love him. And I want to be his mom.“

Kim looked at her, completely shocked. Had Stevie lost her mind?! This was probably the craziest idea he had ever heard of. On the other hand, he had to admit that Stevie was probably the closest version of a woman to Robin he knew. People got married out of dumber reasons, didn't they?