You're G O L D|| Sugimoto Saichi x f!Reader x Ogata Hyakunosuke

山猫

Alternative title: You Can't Shoot Worth Shit

Ushiyama looked at Asirpa's sparkling eyes in confusion, "Are we going to eat them or something?"

Asirpa nodded. "Their brains are delicious!"

Ogata took out his Type 30 and aimed. Asirpa shook her head, "No, Ogata. Don't shoot!"

"Why not?" Ogata asked, "You wanted to eat them right?"

You intervened, "Even if you hit one the others might fly away." Asirpa nodded along with your statement, "Woodcocks fly in a confusing manner, so it'd be difficult to hit them with the rounds you're using."

Ogata ran a hand over his hair and walked off with a, hmph. With the party pooper gone, Asirpa could finally explain how they were gonna catch the shit. "We Ainu know that a trap takes advantage of a woodcocks habits. You use twigs and branches to make paths that a woodcock would most likely follow. Then, you set up a whole bunch of traps along those paths. If we use the traps, we should be able to catch enough woodcocks for everyone to eat."

-=-=-=-=-

Asirpa woke up with a slight frown. The traps had only managed to catch two, Ogata was missing, Sugimoto has farted in his sleep again and Ushiyama snored.

"The traps caught some woodcocks!" Ushiyama said, obviously surprised.

"But..." Sugimoto started, picking both of the birds up in his manly hands, "This isn't enough for everybody."

Asirpa snatched the birds from Sugimoto's hands, set them on a rock, and started plucking the feathers furiously, "Just shut the hell up and help me pluck the damn things." She growled, throwing feathers in Sugimoto's face.

Ushiyama laughed and shook your shoulder, rocking you back and forth, "HA HA! She's mad because she set so many traps but only caught two of 'em!"

Ogata walked over and threw down three birds. Asirpa gasped, "you got three of them?" Ogata ran a hand over his hair once again.

"I was wondering where you went this morning." You hummed.

Ushiyama nodded, "It's amazing that you were able to catch so many without even using a shot."

Ogata leaned back with his hands on his hips and a prideful smile. 

"You really piss me off sometimes... Did you know that?"

Sugimoto rolled his brown eyes, he really does not like Ogata, " I bet the only reason you went out was that Asirpa said you couldn't shoot them!" he jeered.

A frown immediately replaced that proud smirk on Ogata's face.

Asirpa laughed, "Sugimoto's just jealous because he can't shoot worth shit!" 

Sugimoto continued to pluck the feathers with an embarrassed blush on his face, "no I'm not..."

You laughed, then looked down, "wait... That's only five birds. What am I gonna eat?"

Ogata huffed, "Cows don't really need to eat that much."

Your (e/c) eyes filled up with crocodile tears, and looked at Asirpa, "H-he... he"You huffed, rocking the child back and forth. She smacked your hands off of her shoulders, "Doesn't Shiraishi call you that all the time?"

It's different when Shiraishi calls you a cow. You know Shiraishi, he's an idiot with a tiny dick, Ogata's a stranger that stabbed you in the arm.  From the looks of it, Asirpa was not going to help you at all. You huffed, "Fine, I'll catch one by myself." And with that, you calmly walked off into the woods.