Married At Nineteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chris' POV
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There is a time in your life when you would feel you've achieved something long waited and there is a time you know you haven't reached even half a destination.

The later is the case with me. No amount of words can express my feelings. Truth is I don't really understand my feelings and I can't trust it.

My experience with the previous love I had has totally taught me better but also deprived me of trust. Not for my partner but for my heart.

I don't want what happened to me to repeat itself and besides I'm older than Eddy. She is too young and lacks experience from my point of view.

I don't want to hurt her, I can't hurt her, I mustn't hurt her.

But Eddy is surprisingly too mature in character than her looks. Okay that makes me a proud...err.. Spouse?

That seems weirder to say.

I wonder how I say it out loud when in front of people but not to myself or to Eddy. What can I call that?

I did the right thing breaking up with Amarachi right? Yeah I did. She doesn't have a place in my heart any longer. I didn't realize that until yesterday. I knew she didn't but I kept forcing myself that she did.

Love can cheat but not hate. If you hate someone, you are sure you hate that person but love is otherwise. It's as witty as a serpent but as honest as white.

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I looked at the traffic light ahead of me while driving. It suddenly changed red so I pushed down the brake pad beneath my foot, slowing the car to a halt.

I didn't turn off the ignition since I was like the first on the row. I glanced at the rear-view mirror, sighting a lot of cars moving forward behind me.

This state is kind of better than my birth place, the traffic level here is a lot better than there. One could spend hours on the road that's why there aren't lazy heads around there. If you know what is good for you, wake up early enough for work if not you lose it.

What's wrong with me?

All I think about right now is Eddy. How I'm I sure this is even a good feeling. I know it is human to feel this way but it is also human to make wrong choices.

Eddy is a good person and I can't understand why my selfish heart is drawing towards a good one, one I don't deserve. I'm not sure she feels the same way, I guess I'm alone.

We had a wonderful time together at the cafe. The one thing I hardly do with my ex.

I'm already calling her my ex, good start.

Through out our relationship, what Amarachi and I did was mainly make out with each other or she makes me buy a whole mall for her while she just shops her wears.

Wait, is that even a life!?

The only fun is....

Engines turned on as yellow light shone. As soon as the green emerged from its doll covering, I shifted my gear lever, stepping on the accelerator to start moving.

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After twenty-three minutes of driving, I reached the estate. The estate is beautiful but nothing compared to the one we lived in back at home. I know this is temporary anyways.

Few seconds of honking, the security guard opened the gate to the house - the one Eddy and I are supposed to share. Pftt.. We can't even share it.