Orphanage AU: Lams

Chapter 43: Storm

I'm doing really bad at references. Somehow I just can't seem to make them fit.

---Alex's POV---

Storm. Storm. STORM. STORM! STORM, STORM- stop.

I couldn't focus, I was incapable of anything but intense worry. I was acutely aware that I was being exceedingly irrational. Unfortunately, now was one of the uncommon instances where my feelings were too overpowering to be quelled by my logic. Think, think, think... I was writing up a drafted complaint about Jeffershit... After Peggy he deserved hell...

Hellstorm. Storm, storm, storm-

Maybe my gut was right. No. That was absolutely unfathomable. There was literally no destruction outside the window. There were more leaves on the ground. However, they were from excessive rain, nothing more.

There- was there lightning? Thunder?

"Was there lightning? Thunder?" I blurted out the words nanoseconds after I thought them. I instantaneously shut my mouth and stared at my hands, as if I hadn't even inquired, but internally, my pulse was on pause until the answer reached my ears.

"Yeah. I couldn't sleep." John spoke with a careful casualty in his voice that indicated I hadn't quite been as discreet as I had aspired to be about my unfounded anxiety over the recent storm.

Storm. Storm. Storm. Storm, storm....

My heart resumed it's work, faster to make up for the time. Or maybe because thunder. Lightning.

Again. I returned to the couch, only to find I'd only attempted to work for more a mere ten minutes, a miniscule time for me to ever toil.

I slipped a hand into my pocket, pulling out my phone and pressing home with my thumb so it unlocked automatically.

A-L-E-X-A-N-D-E-R: Is everyone ok?

HelplesslyBi: Yes. Alive and well.

AndPeggy: No. I got a hEaRt attack seeing ur ok not okay

GunsAndBaguettes: I'm here

LockUpYourHorses: We good

NeverSatisfied: Peggy, I'll list this:

Caps or capitalize only the first letter

Quotation marks: "ok" not "okay"

NOT FUNNY

Staayyy: We are all perfectly safe and not dead.

They all responded in minutes, and I almost fainted with relief. Leaving my eyes to rest on the last two words not dead, I berated my panic and lack of full sentence, as well as abbreviation. I neglected to do the abbreviation right, as well. It was "okay". If not, "O.K.". If not that, at least "OK". However, I'd written "ok".

One might refer to this as a malfunction. Or, at least for me.

I wallowed in pure relief and deep breathing and the essence of happiness for a few minutes. The survival of my closest and dearest called for a work break.

Nearest and dearest save those already dead.

No. Why was this so recurring. I groaned and rubbed my eyes with the heels of my palms before tilting my head back to gaze at the white ceiling.

Well, I'd received the privilege of a relief-induced high for at least a minute before my memories derailed it. I supposed I couldn't complain.

Still. I did wish it would stop bothering me.

It was a distracting subject.

And a painful one.

---John's POV---

I watched my... acquaintances'...? group chat step up one by one.

Alive and well.

I'm here.

We good.

We are all perfectly safe and not dead.

They didn't make a big deal about it and it seemed like they were just saying hi. But somehow they were a bit more sober. Instead of yup or yo or hey or yeah, they were a bit more serious.

And instead of fighting and virtually interrupting each other, they took turns. It was like they were showing Alex they were there.

Or, in Maria's words, that they were all perfectly safe and not dead.

I was almost sure this was a direct reaction to the thing I said about the storm. Especially after I told him about he thunder and the lightning.

I sighed. Back to the worksheet. 9/10. I wished I could teach better.

But seriously, what was the fear of storms- or maybe it was just an irrational fear based on nothing. Really, that was a possibility.

Or maybe not. But it really wasn't important, if he didn't want to talk about it, that was his choice.

It didn't take long for me to grade the papers, and soon the bell rang, leaving me to watch the short spell of peace that came with the storm unravel like unfinished knitting as the teachers tore themselves apart.

Again. It was pretty funny... I sighed wistfully. Why couldn't I join their antics? Because I wasn't witty and smart like them.

Because my social skills were bad, my comeback skills didn't exist...

I watched affectionately and admiringly as Alex destroyed argument after argument. You could practically hear his matter-of-fact bored tone.

A-L-E-X-A-N-D-E-R: Your argumentative skills are evidently not up to par.

LockUpYourHorses: To fucking bad

A-L-E-X-A-N-D-E-R: Language, Herc. Also, it's "too" not "to".

A-L-E-X-A-N-D-E-R: It truly is a shame, I full heartedly agree. It is rather monotonous conducting such unintellectual conversations.

AndPeggy: TF is monononoos

A-L-E-X-A-N-D-E-R: Question mark, Peggy. There is no such thing as "monononoos".

Yes. Judging from the chaos that sliced through the group chat, it was clear that they had purposefully been peaceful and orderly this morning.

What did they know that I didn't? Why was Alex so scared that they weren't ok? What did that have to do with the storm?

It suddenly occurred to me that Alex's first thought when he began freaking out was about me. Only after he made sure (a bunch of times) that I was ok did he check everyone else.

My heart thumped as color rose to my cheeks. He cared about me that much?

Alone in the room, I broke out into a wide grin. Awwwwww. My blush deepened as I thought about his concern for me when I broke down- in Angelica's classroom, in the hallway after Connor threw the printer, in the dorm.

... Maybe he did like me. Was that such a wild notion?... Yes, yes it was. He wasn't even gay! Or bi! Or pan! Or homoflexible! Or even heteroflexible... damn. I had no chance.

And... he could've been worried because of my past breakdowns. After something bad happened he thought of me first because, well, maybe he thought I was more fragile.

Oh no. This was exactly why I didn't want other people to know about Father- now that I told him about my problems, I was a charity case. He felt bad for me. Pity.

I wanted to cry.

But his presence was addictive. I couldn't help but cling to him anyway. The air seemed clearer whenever he was here.

RaiseAGlassToTurtles: Orchard?

A-L-E-X-A-N-D-E-R: I have no objections.

Wellll kinda a short one, sorry.

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