let her go ; jenzie

17. | fully intact

MACKENZIE ZIEGLER dropped all her belongings onto the floor of her room, flinching slightly when a loud thud sounded. kicking her vans aside carelessly, mackenzie tossed her phone onto her bed. she rummaged around for a scrunchie, messily tying her wavy, chestnut hair into a ponytail.

mackenzie strided over to her swivel chair, slumping into it. she rested her head on her hands. she was so confused. about... about everything, really. her relationship with johnny orlando. that kiss with lily chee. who were the real friends and were was not.

she drummed her fingers against her desk, watching the blurred movement of her red nail polish dance wildly. what was her sexuality? mackenzie had always thought of herself as straight, but now she was having second thoughts. although mackenzie had no feelings for the older girl, the kiss her and lily shared wasn't meaningless. it did feel good, sweet like honey, smooth as silk.

maybe it was because lily was a great kisser, good, enough to keep her wondering. mackenzie hated to admit it, but it was on the same level as the kisses she and johnny exchanged while they were in a romantic relationship. both were glorious, made out of stardust and molten gold.

it was times like these she wished she could be a child again.

pure, innocent, sweet. oblivious of all the troubles that came with growing up. the worst thing to her when she was a child was having to go to bed.

her heart was fully intact, bright red, never aching, never broken. now, her heart felt torn, shattered, the colour of grey, murky waters, slowly fading to black. she bathed in loneliness, but instead of getting out of it like you would normally when you have a bath, she stayed there, her skin becoming weighed down with all the negativity, the poisoned waters drowning her soul and heart, gasping for air.

and it wouldn't be long before the dark side took her.

a u t h o r ' s n o t e

i feel poetic