What Happens In A Small Town

Chapter Fourteen

K E L S E Y

Lauren stares at me seemingly in shock for a minute "Huh? Wow okay... Can't say I expected that but what did he do that made you lock yourself in here?"

I let out another sigh "That's the thing Laur it wasn't anything bad, but he played this song tonight the very last one and announced to the entire audience that the inspiration for it was there I knew it was about me hell 98% of them are and he was looking me in the eye for 90% of the song and I just freaked out"

Lauren nods at me laying her hands on my shoulders "Alright sweetie just breathe... What song?"

I blow out a breath "You Don't Know Her Like I Do"

She nods again "alright how did you know it was about you? And why'd you freak out?" 

I look her in the eye "just listening to the words the first time I heard it and I knew it was about me and I'm so fucking terrified that if I do it and something happens that I'm going to push him right back in what I lost him too in the first place." I can feel the tears in my eyes by now " and I can't do that to him again... Don't misread that I'm not saying it's my fault but after I left him was when it got really bad and I was so scared that one of those phone calls from PJ, Jesse, Ben or Kolby was going to be the one telling me that we lost him for good... Those four always kept me in the loop of what was happening with him whether I wanted to know it or not. I never directly talked to them though they left me voicemails and I listened to them when I could work up the nerve"

She pulls me into a hug "come here sweetie" 

I hug her back "Everything I told you, Britt and Lina that night was the truth... I fucking love him to death... I always have, I mean he was my first everything and even when I left him it was because I loved him and I couldn't watch him go down that road again, I had already been there twice before and I did everything I could to help him but he didn't want help, he didn't want to admit that he had a problem and it didn't stick and I didn't have it in me to watch him keep slowly killing himself every time he picked up one of those damn bottles"

Lauren sighs looking me in the eyes "I don't know exactly how you feel but I do know with what you've told me here and last summer that you are still in love with him and I also know he wasn't moving from in front of that door until you talked to him, well before I had to drag him out by his ear, so if that's anything to go by I'd say he feels the same way about you"  

I wipe the tears off my face "I don't doubt that he doesn't still love me because pick an album and there is at least one song on them that says it but I couldn't take losing him again it would break me completely, I barely pulled myself back up when I left him and I know that was what needed to be done it was the right thing to do but that doesn't mean it didn't hurt like hell every day, god there were so many times that I almost caved after listening to one of the voicemails but I knew he wouldn't sober up unless he wanted to so I forced myself to stay away from him and eventually I got my number changed so I wouldn't have to hear about him anymore"

She sighs giving me a look "something tells me you aren't going to listen to me about this."

L A U R E N

I love Kels to death but sometimes she's just too stubborn for her own good, I shoot a text to Lina who is also joining us for a few weeks.

Laur:
Do you think I can pull you away from your husband for a little while to talk to Kelsey?

Lina:
Of course, what's going on?

Laur:
Just come over here Kels and I are locked in the backroom she refused to talk to anyone else but she let me in and I have a feeling she won't listen to me alone so I figured maybe bringing you in as well she might actually listen

Lina:
I'll be right there

****

Ohh bringing Caroline in now and you better believe she is going to try and whip some sense into Kelsey about the BG thing. Also, there were actual tears involved in writing this chapter. My poor babies have been through so much.