Dear Evan Hansen: Erica's story

Chapter 9

The next few weeks went by rather quickly and hiding this pregnancy was becoming harder, my stomach was starting to grow and people we pointing and whispering in the hallways, "That is Connor's girlfriend and she's pregnant!" I couldn't believe all these whispers, "Erica is dating Zoe, yet she was Connors." I am not sure how else I would've coped if I didn't have my beautiful supportive girlfriend Zoe. She was the light when it was dark and the best part is, Evan and I are going to The Murphy's house for dinner tonight and we are having gluten-free lasagna. Yeah, that food is gross but I will be a good house guest and eat it anyway.                                                        

The end of the day came around fast and I caught a ride with Zoe after she was finished with band, "So, what is it like being pregnant?" I sighed and rubbed my stomach but smiled at the same time, "It's hard, sore, uncomfortable and painful. On the bright side, I cannot wait until my daughter makes it into the world." That caused Zoe to laugh a little as we pulled up. Zoe and I shared one last kiss before we headed inside.                                                                                                        

"Erica! Can you come here for a second" Mrs. Murphy called from the kitchen as we walked in, Zoe rolled her eyes and I gave her arm a playful punch, "Zolo, you go and wait for me in your room. Ok?" I asked her with a puppy dog look. She can never resist that look from anyone, she just nodded adding "Good Luck Eri" as she ascended up the staircase. I made my way to the kitchen thinking about Connor and how he would be feeling right now, I was snapped from my thoughts by Mrs. Murphy cutting me off. "Erica, Larry and I have started putting together a gift for you when your baby arrives, so we need to know is it team pink or team blue?" At that moment realization hit me, I had only told Zoe what the baby's gender was. I am not great at remembering this stuff. "It's a girl!" I responded with a smile but not before adding "Connor always said that if he ever had a girl and then he would name her Danielle, so I am sticking to his choice." Mrs. Murphy smiled back and hugged me, I think it's a brilliant idea and I am sure Connor would be-" She was cut off by Mr. Murphy entering the room, not once had I seen this guy cry or smile. No wonder Zoe and Connor were sometimes uptight. "Connor would love that you choose to name the baby Danielle." I gave them both a small smile and then I had an idea. "Actually, can I take some of Connor's shirts, I want to make Danielle a comforter out of them? Is that ok?" I asked hesitantly. They both looked at each other and then back at me, they both nodded and I went upstairs to Zoe's room, well I had to make a small pit-stop by Connor's room first. 

 As I approached Connor's room I heard voices and that triggered the flashback of the last time I saw Connor alive, I didn't go in this time though I stayed watching through the door, enough so I could see but out of sight from the people in there, surprised to see Evan and Zoe in there. "He wondered how you learned to dance, like the rest of the world isn't there." I mean what the hell is Evan on about, Connor never told me that, All these things Evan was continuing to say... sounded less and less like things Connor would say, Connor never told me any of these things. Then finally one thing that did make sense. Connor did love Zoe, he really did, I looked at my stomach smiling only to wish I hadn't looked up. Zoe and Evan had locked lips and were kissing. Zoe was cheating on me. I stepped into the room with tears streaming down my face, how could she do this to me. "What are you doing?" She asked Evan and then turned to me. "Erica... I... It's not what you think. I swear." I shook my head. She tried hugging me but I pushed her off. "You lying, cheating, piece of shit! If you really wanted to know what Connor had said why didn't you ask me? It's fine that you asked him. I just didn't think you would cheat on me." I then turned my attention to Evan, "You! My brother of all people the one person who is supposed to be there for me and be honest with me. Screw both of you, hope you are very happy together."                            

However, our argument was interrupted by Mrs. Murphy, "Erica, Evan, Zoe... Dinners ready! Guys!" I shook my head, I wasn't eating anything from this house, I just left and apologized to Mrs. Murphy. I ran home and cried into my pillow. It happened! I was officially alone.